First meeting with pdoc
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| Wed, 07-19-2006 - 6:53pm |
I had my first meeting with my new pdoc today. He was very nice. I kept calm through out our discussion. We didn't go into too much detail because I had to give him a background on everything. There is soooooo much! I can't say I actually feel any better because our discussion was so broad. I see him again next week, same time, same place.
I think I would feel just a hint better if I heard an ounce of compassion in my boyfriend's voice... He says he loves me... Says he wants to be together... but there is absolutely no emotion in his voice (and I'm not being paranoid about this). There is no love in his tone. It rips me apart... It makes me so much worse... It gives me NO hope. I'm supposed to fly out to Florida on Friday morning to go see him, but I don't know if I should even go. First of all, he's out there with a bunch of other guys and I don't feel up to socializing. Second of all, he's not been warm and welcoming on the phone at all. He doesn't sound like he wants me there. I don't want to fly out there and make matters worse.
I'm sad. I really wish I had something to look forward to... something to be happy about.

((((((((((Sweetie)))))))))))) I wish I had the answers for your plight. I know you are depressed and that can tend to make things seem a lot worse than they really are. The only thing I can suggest is to ask him if he really wants you to come on Friday and ask him to be totally honest with you. Tell him you need that from him. Explain where you are at emotionally right now and how you are feeling. Hopefully that will help clear the air. I am hoping that he truly wants you there and that your depression is just
God could not be everywhere, so