Still going strong...
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Still going strong...
| Sun, 04-03-2011 - 3:54pm |
So nothing from me. I haven't tried talking to him! I'm proud of myself. This next week is going to be tough because I'm battling the "I want to keep him interested in me" feeling and the "what if he moves on?" voice in my head. I have come this far though and I feel like I can keep it up. The reason being I am not devastated...I'm not even so sad...I'm HAPPY!!! I feel in control and okay. I have spent quality time with my family!

You have described how I have been feeling today as well! I am still feeling the pull and the sinking that he doesn't care. I know LC is all I can do but the need keeps popping up. Grrr but I do feel the resolve to press on tonight and have had a lovely family day.
How to silence the thoughts and stop the feelings - am hanging on. Thanks for your post. It really helps.
theyellowone xx
"Not until we are lost do we begin to understand ourselves." ~Henry David Thoreau~
"Not until we are lost do we begin to understand ourselves." ~Henry David Thoreau~
You will get past this stage and when you do, you can start examining why you need validation and you can learn to achieve it through a healthier source.
Be gentle with yourself. This takes time. I am nearly six months out of my A and there are still moments when I think of him way too much. I realize I too am needing some type of validation during those moments. That's all it is because I sure don't miss the anxiety and guilt I felt in the A. No amount of attention from a JAM can make me feel better about myself than doing the hard work on my own to better understand my issues, needs and the direction I want to take in my life.
Stay the course.
Struggling today - working from home as daughter ill. Workedcthrough initial feeling of disappointment as wouldn't see xAP - I know - felt so bad having tha thought and then good to quash it. But now sinking again as all emails are so impersonal and it hurts.
I know it's validation, I know he's not worth it - but am struggling with the gear change at work. Sorry to hijack thread - will post separately.
theyrllowon
"Not until we are lost do we begin to understand ourselves." ~Henry David Thoreau~