how do you get a pdoc to listen?

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-22-2006
how do you get a pdoc to listen?
3
Thu, 09-14-2006 - 9:12pm

I am still trying to get the med scene to work...cuz it isn't. Pdoc is determined to get topamax to work as a monotherapy mood stabilizer. It isn't. Period. I've told him. I've called him. We've increased it. We've increased the a/d. Then we increase the topamax. Now we are going to increase the topamax a lot more. I still don't sleep- he won't give me anything- he expects the topamax will take care of it...when??? It's been 2 months now that I've been on it with virtually no change. I can't say I'm much different on it than off of it. Other than occasionally missing the sleep, no difference. My dh is totally annoyed- to the point he said he wants to talk to the pdoc. So I called pdoc today to tell him again that dh wants to talk (told him at med check on Tues). The response: "it's no mystery that you are still struggling. We are making a change by increasing your meds- lets wait and see, have dh come to the next meeting in 6 weeks". Ok, that's great. As long as I don't drink myself into a grave by then (which he is well aware of and acknowledges that I am doing because the meds aren't working!!!). So, anyway, I am stuck with this pdoc because there are none others in my area who are accepting new patients. He is it. My only hope. Tdoc is stressed cuz she knows this isn't working. I told dh tonight that I really don't care if I am killing myself by drinking (very much a reality with medical conditions I have). Not something I recommend saying to your dh. He was quite upset (rightfully so) and I told him that is part of the problem...I just don't care. He said what about the kids? I said yeah, the kids...that's the funny thing, I can't control all the stuff going on in my head- I hate it...totally hate it. I so want to run away from this all- the family, the meds, the tdoc, my job. I have had enough and just want some down time, some quiet time. It's not like my mind is racing, I'm just tired of it all (way more going on in my family than most of you know about, which isn't helping any of this).

I just don't get what this guy is trying to prove. I point blank asked him before we started meds if topamax is successful as monotherapy and he said no, it's typically used as an adjunct therapy. Um, hello? Then why am I using it as monotherapy??? I realize my medical condition limits the use of some meds, but, come on. At this point, I think I'm better off without any meds. It was less frustrating- at least I had a reason to feel the way I did. This illness sucks, so do the meds and everything that goes with it (like having to waste one of my very limited number of yearly outpatient psych visits for a stupid 15 min. med check).

Peg

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-22-2006
Fri, 09-15-2006 - 10:15am
Hi Peg! I am sorry you are having such a rough time with your pdoc and your meds right now. Sometimes, from what I've read, I know it can take years to get them sorted out. Sorry, didn't mean to depress you further!! Can you strike a deal with your pdoc? Say, you two agree to increase for "x" amount of time and if no change, then complete agreement to switch to another course or try something different? Maybe he'll be more amenable to that as opposed to saying it's just not working. That way he can feel in control!!
I know from reading prior posts that you had an alcohol thing a few years ago but walked away from it. Maybe you need to do what you did then, since it worked last time?
I know how you feel about being sick and tired of everything. I constantly struggle with that myself. The ongoing problem I have with my dh is having him realize that I can't help it. And then realize, and realize it, again and again. They forget or don't get it.
I always have to force myself to not walk away from job, family, whatever and it's just sheer will. I'm sorry I can't help you out!!
I hope things improve soon - I'll be thinking of you!!
Love and Much Hugs, Kelli





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iVillage Member
Registered: 05-02-2006
Fri, 09-15-2006 - 10:29am

(((((((Peg)))))) I wish I had the answer to that question. Kelli had a good suggestion though. See if he'll agree to give this increase a specified amount of time and if there is no change agree to try a different course of

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-20-2004
Fri, 09-15-2006 - 12:15pm

Oh Peg,


First I want to say Everything said before me is spot on!

Love,