UGH...this is confusing

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-09-2009
UGH...this is confusing
8
Thu, 04-07-2011 - 12:09am

Okay, long story short...A few years back a had what I thought would be a one night stand with a business partner that I had a friendship started with already.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-02-2011
Thu, 04-07-2011 - 2:07am

Just looks like a pattern developing here with you being a side dish

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-22-2009
Thu, 04-07-2011 - 10:00am

Galthinker,

Is your name derived from thinking too much? :smileywink:

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Forget about his intentions. What's more important is what are your intentions? Hopefully you have none other than discussing business, and as the previous poster said, SET BOUNDARIES. You don't have to verbalize them to him, just know what they are. i,e, conversations that are strictly professional. If they start going off track, rope them back into business only. Our tone, our attitude, and our "lack of emotion" can make it perfectly clear that we are not interested in them on a personal level.

If you do not have to talk to him, then don't. Make sure this is for the benefit of your profession and read nothing else into it. You are in control of who is and who is not allowed into your head.

((Hugs))

Be where you are; otherwise you will miss your life. ~ Buddha
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-09-2009
Thu, 04-07-2011 - 12:07pm
Okay...so really we don't have to communicate at all. We have gotten by for a year without. Yes, it is mutually beneficial for the business because his business as well as mine benefits when he is positively involved in my business. However, he can get his check by working with anyone in the business. That is where my question lies...why would he risk everything with his wife even talking to me...she obviously wants nc to continue bc she has unfriended me 3 times from his facebook and then he friended me again on sat and within 24 hrs she completely blocked me.
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-20-2009
Thu, 04-07-2011 - 12:17pm

Well, that new information changes things.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-23-2010
Thu, 04-07-2011 - 12:23pm

why would he risk everything with his wife even talking to me

Because he is a master manipulator and he knows that you will drop your morals and hide out and be his dirty little secret whenever he feels he needs a side dish. You won't tell her, so in his mind he can continue to play the both of you like a fiddle. He knows that you are willing to shred your dignity (as we all did) and stroke his fragile ego. Please? You had s*x with him in his backyard with his W at home. Wasn't that enough to make you stop yourself from sinking into his awful little nasty game? He has no respect for you, himself, his W or anyone at this point, and he obviously doesn't think that you have any respect for yourself either.

It's time to stop worrying about why he is acting so low down and dig yourself out of the abyss and show him that you love yourself a little more than just being someone's "you know what".

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-09-2009
Thu, 04-07-2011 - 1:19pm
So, none of you feel that this could be business only?
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-25-2010
Thu, 04-07-2011 - 1:24pm
business isn't conducted by friending you on FB - and no I don't think for a second that he is in this with the intentions of keeping it "friendly". Like I always say - once twirled up in a milkshake - you can never get back to just vanilla.
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iVillage Member
Registered: 10-16-2010
Thu, 04-07-2011 - 6:30pm

galthinker i am in with the other women here: