One month NC today!

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-24-2011
One month NC today!
10
Mon, 04-11-2011 - 9:04pm
Don't know if I would classify this as a success or not a's most have witnessed my almost daily struggle. For the newest of the newbies I can share that one month NC as of today has not been easy (I work with exAP) but I promise it is a bit easier. Easier enough that I can breathe again. I saw a counsellor for the first time today and that helped. It is still a raw thing for me but I can actually see now that things do get better and will continue to get better. For me the best thing from this board has been my 2 new buddies that I private message (ALL day long) LOL! We keep each other going.

As tempted as I am to contact exAP sone days I do know NC is for the best.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-24-2011
Mon, 04-11-2011 - 9:34pm
Tuff, one month is fantastic!!!

New newbies - I hope you're listening up :) This is what one month of dedicated NC/LC can achieve. Just 30 days of dignified silence and you'll be breathing easier and feeling so much better ... Oops - I feel myself at risk of sliding into a late night "money back guarantee" advertorial for the miraculous powers of NC, so I'll leave it there ... :)

Tuff, huge hugs to you honey. You're doing great!
Avatar for blueclouds1627
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-26-2011
Mon, 04-11-2011 - 10:23pm
Congrats Tuff!
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-06-2011
Tue, 04-12-2011 - 6:48am

I think I needed to read this this morning. 7 days NC for me and I woke up this morning so sad :(

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-22-2009
Tue, 04-12-2011 - 7:19am

Tuff,

Most definitely, one month is HUGE around here. You are breathing easier already so just imagine what another month can do. I am also so proud of you for going to counseling and have cyber buddies for back up. You are doing all the right things. It just takes time and patience, so keep going in the positive direction that you are. By summer you will we be amazed by your own strength and how far it has taken you. This in turn builds up your self esteem and before you know it, you will start to see Xmm morph into JAM who will have you rolling your eyes and muttering under your breath, "WTH was I thinking?"

Be where you are; otherwise you will miss your life. ~ Buddha
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-11-2010
Tue, 04-12-2011 - 8:13am
Hey TTBT

It's an amazing thing isn't it? If you just concentrate on getting through a day at a time- you find that a week has passed, then two and then a month!

I would never have thought I could go NC, and in many ways I'm lucky that my exAP doesn't fish (plus our previous normal communication channels are blocked).

But you do get through it don't you. Despite thinking it will kill you - it doesn't! It does in fact make you stronger.

ExAP takes up their rightful part in your life - as a small hill you toughened yourself on that gets smaller and smaller in your rear view mirror.

Keep moving forward, next thing we know we will be at three months!!!!

Iggyxx
You are what you consistently do
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-24-2011
Tue, 04-12-2011 - 9:19am
Genevieve, I didn't think I could do it either. But you can and you will be better for it :)
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-07-2011
Tue, 04-12-2011 - 10:17am

Congratulations on one month Tuff! That in itself is an awesome accomplishment and I'm right there with you as well. It does and will get better. The heaviness will subside, and life and the most simplest of things will become so much more vivid. You're doing this :) And congrats as well for going to counseling. You've got the tools in hand to make this happen and I know you will. One step, one day at a time.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-31-2011
Tue, 04-12-2011 - 11:45am
Trying,

One month is HUGE! And, I totally empathize with the "breathing" part. It's still dificult, but nothing compared to the first week when it feels like we've been punched in the gut!

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-01-2011
Tue, 04-12-2011 - 12:59pm
Well done tuff - knew you would do it! Xxx

"Not until we are lost do we begin to understand ourselves." ~Henry David Thoreau~

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-16-2010
Tue, 04-12-2011 - 10:02pm

Fantastic TTBT!!

melinda