feeling at sea today....

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-01-2011
feeling at sea today....
6
Tue, 04-12-2011 - 2:04pm

I really must start posting when I am in the throws of

"Not until we are lost do we begin to understand ourselves." ~Henry David Thoreau~

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-01-2011
Tue, 04-12-2011 - 3:30pm

I think you know that I am back...my third try at NC.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-31-2011
Tue, 04-12-2011 - 4:37pm
Yellow,

i work with my xAP as well, though not directly.

I've had 2 or 3 work-related run-ins with him since our ending and it gets better. It's like a callus develops.

The first time was very diffcult, thought about him too much after the encounter.

But, the second time was better and the last one was last Thursday and I'm hardly affected - not COMPLETELY unfazed, but I'm amazed how much less than the first time.

For me, the key was the knowledge that I HAVE POWER to stop thoughts of him staying in my mind.

Stay as LC as possible and soon the good days will outnumber the bad days.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-24-2011
Tue, 04-12-2011 - 9:51pm
Yellowone, I have been reading all of your posts, and even if you can't see it yourself, I can see your progress. Even just the fact that you have no desire to contact him outside of work hours anymore is HUGE. You are doing everything right honey. Now you've just gotta stick to LC, take the magic pill called "time", and trust us when we say that it will get better. You've been so warm and generous with your support of others on this Board and I have no doubt that you're going to make it.

Big hugs and smiles

Kat
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-01-2011
Wed, 04-13-2011 - 8:26am
Thanks for your replies. Have booked a counselling session for next week so am feeling more control.

Am still a bit teary but I love my job abd have worked hard so I need to everything I can to heal and move forward. I am not going to leave it because if the mistakes we made. I just need help going forward and rebuild the strength and integrity I know I have!

Thanks for being here Xx

"Not until we are lost do we begin to understand ourselves." ~Henry David Thoreau~

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-15-2010
Wed, 04-13-2011 - 6:53pm

Hi, Yellowone.

I haven't posted here in a long time but I do read here almost every day. I wanted to respond to your message becuz I, too work with xmm.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-01-2011
Wed, 04-13-2011 - 7:16pm
Thanku sisterchange. I think I feel I should be further along and should have got it by now. Your advice is so helpful and I am going to enforce an even stricter LC tomorrow. Take care xx

"Not until we are lost do we begin to understand ourselves." ~Henry David Thoreau~