BF's Father in Manic state need advice
Find a Conversation
| Mon, 10-09-2006 - 6:13pm |
Hello all and TIA for any advice. I'm very new to this and know only what I've been able to find online.
My Boyfriends father is in the middle of a 2-month long manic state. He has had many before and each seems to get worse. This is the first since we have been dating. What he is doing:
1. Spending tons of money, which of course he does not have, they are on a very limited income.
2. Making sexual advances to female family members and other women he meets. He also get very rough with his wife while trying to have sex, since he is unable to at this point. They just recieved a letter from the DA that they are pressing charges. Apparently he just last week grabbed a woman, kissed her on the neck, put his hands up her shirt, and wanted her to go home with him. He did not get any farther, but that was far enough and is now facing prosecution.
3. He does not sleep, he is gone all hours of the night, wife doesn't know where he goes. He says he lost track of time, fell asleep in a parking lot, or was just out.
4. Has now been hanging out at the local bars. I know this is a problem mixing alcohol and the meds he is on.
5. Tends to find one thing and focus on it. This past weekend was trying to fix his camera he broke at my son's birthday party. Of course it was the films fault it wasn't working not the camera.
His wife is terrified of him and afraid to sleep at night. I asked if he could be put in the hospital to get over this problem and get meds regulated, but he has been BP so long he knows all the answers the docs are looking for. They say he is too aware of what is going on to commit him and it has to be self commital which of course he won't do.
Yesterday he left his wife at our house and said he was going to the store. 4 hrs later he still wasn't back. We ended up taking mom home and had to break into her house as her purse and keys were in his car, along with her money. Thru phone calls later we found out he was calling one of the female relatives asking her to meet him for sex and that he bought a new cd player for the car, a new camera and jewelry for the lady. He called her several times and then the last said come meet me before I hurt myself or someone else I have a gun in the car. We don't believe he had a gun but not sure.
BF's poor mom is at her wit's end and about to have a breakdown from all the problems he is causing. Is there anything I can do to help, Can anyone point me towards the right agencies to contact.
Thanks a bunch,
Deanna in PA

First off, it doesn't sound like he is getting any treatment for his illness, no counseling or meds. Meds are very important for bipolars. He obviously he
~ Tina ~
BFs mom needs to get OUT of that house...she also needs to go to the courthouse, like Tina said, and have him committed involuntarily. Yes, so he knows the "answers", it won't matter much if they tell the judge of her fear of him, and the pending charges.
He is a danger. In this really advanced state of mania, there is no guarantees. Your bf's mom needs to leave, and take care of herself right now.
I wish there were an easy answer to this. But there just isn't.
He should be committed ASAP.
Call your local county mental health agency and find out how to get started on the 5150 proceedings - Baker Act.
Hugs,
Keli
Thank you Keli and Tina,
BF was away on business last night and when he gets hmoe this evening I will share your posts with him. unfortunately, he tends to pull away when dad acts up. His mom asked if he would keep checking up on her and I told him I will nag him so he keeps calling. She lives about 45 mins from us one way, so It's not a quick stop over to see how you are doing kinda drive. I was also planning on calling her counties MHMR to help point me in the right direction. I hate to see both her sons just sitting back, avoiding the situation, and something bad happen to her. BF did say he was willing to take mom in if it comes to that, my ODD that spends e/o weekend here would just have to give up her room as we only have 1 spare, but considering the circumstances I'm sure that wouldn't be a problem.
Thanks a bunch,
Dee