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| Wed, 04-13-2011 - 10:15am |
My dear cousin is divorcing his W because he found out she had a two year A. My sweet cousin looked at me and ask me how in the world can a person sleep with someone else and come home whisteling Dixie like nothing happened. I broke down and told my cousin about my A and my DH's A and I told him that somehow we transform ourselves into separate ppl during our A. I told him that it is almost like an out of body experience where we live totally different lives. He was very shocked that I had an A (so am I still to this day).
He has so much hatred for his W and doesn't want anything to do with her. It's sad really because they have two beautiful children who are under 10 years old and they have a beautiful life. I begged and pleaded with him to give his M a second chance and try to rebuild but he has left her and said he never wants to trust or touch her again.
His W is a SAHM and he has a very big income. He will continue to support her financially until the D but he wants nothing to do with her. This is a warning for those of you who are wavering with your AP and are M. Some ppl really can't forgive an A, and if you are struggling I seriously want you to consider that you can loose everything.

((Mom))
I am so sorry your cousin can only see things in black and white. If the wound is still fresh, this seems to happen more with men BS's than with women. Women tend to be more forgiving. Still, unless papers have already been filed, he may have a change of heart after his anger subsides some. If the D is already in progress, I feel very bad for the children. They are always the innocent casualties of affairs.
I can only hope that those who have recently ended their affairs (and are here reading this board), understand just how serious the consequences are when there is a D-Day, (which can come even after the A has ended). It has happened here several times, so imagine what is happening to M's touched by an affair outside of the IVillage Community.
You are one of the lucky ones. Not everyone gets a 2nd chance.
((Hugs))
From most articles I have read on infidelity, men usually do not forgive an affair very easily because of their male pride and ego. And most of them end up throwing the affair in your face for many years afterwards or end up eventually feeling entitled to a revenge affair.