To see POOP after 2 years

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-17-2010
To see POOP after 2 years
6
Tue, 04-19-2011 - 1:57am

Dear Everyone,

How time flies that it has been a year (1st quarter 2010?) since my first post and Iddy's word to me is 'it takes two to tango' which is the same word i used to tell to xap when he told me that i was his first and true love, LOL! I am MW, xap is MM. No dday as i ended it.

Anyway, xap is coming to town in about 3 weeks and i don't know what would be my reaction should i see him again face to face. Mid of 2009 when they moved to another place, very far. I am sure of myself that i am not the same woman she left behind. His moving is a blessing since i had time to search my soul during his physical absence.

What i want to say is i don't want to see him because it is pointless for me but it is definite that we will see each other again since we belong to the same group and that there'll be a homecoming for him, sort of. I cannot be absent on that occasion because i was one of the officers of our group.

The only thing that is funny here is that i am not excited about his vacation and i no longer long for him. I am very grateful to EAS for saving me and my life.

Though I am already mentally prepared but i want to make sure that i will apply them during actual encounter. I am past flagging myself for my stupidity then and to let myself for an A relapse is unforgivable for me.

Can someone share your experience on how good you handle yourself the first time you saw your xap jam poop after a long time?

My gratitude :)

LW2010

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-18-2008
Tue, 04-19-2011 - 11:04am

Hi L&W,

There were a couple of threads involving just the question you are asking from SecretLifeofJane and CSN when they had to see their xAP’s face to face due to work/events. You might want to go back through the general discussion to find them. I think they were back in late ’09 or early 2010. Lots of good advice in those threads of how to handle the situation. You could try the search feature but I haven’t had much luck with that.

Also TU, has had lots of experience with seeing xAP in LC situations because of work. Hopefully she can chime in with some advice.

Given the threats he has issued to you previously, I would hope there was a way for you to not go. Will your H accompany you to the event? I hope you would have a plan in place to not be alone at anytime during the event where xAP could approach you and try and make more threats to you.

Hugs,

E1

Whether you think you can or you think you can't you are probably right. A parrot can repeat what it has learned but the mark of true intelligence is applying what is learned.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-18-2008
Tue, 04-19-2011 - 11:11am

Whether you think you can or you think you can't you are probably right. A parrot can repeat what it has learned but the mark of true intelligence is applying what is learned.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-14-2008
Tue, 04-19-2011 - 11:58am

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-22-2009
Tue, 04-19-2011 - 12:24pm

L & W,

Searching for old posts with this new forum is like finding a needle in a haystack. :smileymad:, so I wouldn't even try to go that route. I will tell you want I told Jane back in the day, and that is to never look him straight in the eye, surround yourself by people you know, and take your H if you can.

Be where you are; otherwise you will miss your life. ~ Buddha
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-17-2010
Sun, 05-01-2011 - 10:28pm

Thank you very much for the advice and comment.

Yes, JAM is in the house and i know that he will call once the plane has landed.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-24-2011
Sun, 05-01-2011 - 10:46pm
Great advice from Bandk.:)

If you have to see JAM you're going to be cool, calm, collected, and distantly polite. Use those excuses to stay out of his way. Block those calls. And check in with us often.

I'm sending you lots of strength and composure. You can do this!