Hello :)

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-31-2006
Hello :)
4
Mon, 10-30-2006 - 4:21am

My name is Harmony, I am 30 years old & have had BP for the last 15 years that's how long ago I was first told I suffered from ' manic depression' last year (05) I had one of the worst 'episodes' in my life (for me anyway's) . I went back on med's & was doing really well then I have currently stopped them for what ever reason this time. I know I NEED them but I get to a point I feel better & there for don't need them. I am currently trying to find a new psychiatrist in order to get the lamectil (sp) my reg Dr can not right that script. I also take lithium. That I found to work the best out of the other 5 or 6 I tried. Prozac in the very beginning then zoloft I hated it made me feel numb then last year paxil,depakot (sp) lexapro then the lithium. I was on 1200mg a day but finally went to 800 mg with lamectil. I didn't like the last "head dr" she never spent more then 3 minutes with me and was trying to take the lithium away and tell me I was ADHD. That was 3 visit's now I'm not a dr I have seen 3 other DR's & she was the 3rd in that field & the 1st to say ADHD not BP. I was doing counseling but stopped. My Dr said I was someone that could not go on meds & then come off I had to take them daily and for the rest of my life. She almost put me in the hospital last year I have been admitted once before for 6 weeks. If I feel I'm going back to where I was I try my hardest to change my daily routine and not hide in my room . I think I have done well. I suffer from 'random' thinking panic attacks and really bad deprisson I cry for nothing at nothing and for ever I dont want to hurt myself but I do think about how much better I feel if I want here anymore. I cant sleep sometimes last year went 7 days no sleep ...it was horriable I feel better then last year but I know I feel much happier on the meds sometimes I feel to happy lol. I dont let thing's bother me or I try not to but some days it is like I hate life I hate my job people ect. others I could care less....a roller coaster is what I call it. I even have 'bad' days when on meds it is the daily soga of trying to balance myself out that I hate.

I have gotten abck into cooking I love to cook I am on th Q&E board here @ IV every day :)
I got pets that keep me busy & I do enjoy my tv shows. I do not have my daughter haven sine she was 18months old , that is when I was put in the hospital its a long story but I m happy with the decisions I made for her & her dad is the BEST ever!

I rambled on didnt I???? I just wanted to say hi give a story on myself and hopefully stay around a while. She what others with BP do howthey live and what kind of meds they take.

Have a good day!


 

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-22-2006
In reply to: butterflymelt
Mon, 10-30-2006 - 7:37am

Hi Harmony! Welcome to the board! We have had med debates many times here - to take or not to take? And I think everyone agrees that we are notorious for continually going off of them because "we don't need them" - you are right at home here!
Personally, I take Lamictal and Prozac - both slowly increasing and I believe it's helped me. I tried Lithium and it wasn't for me. The meds don't take everything away but the roller coaster is less steep on the way up and down.
I have 5 dogs currently - one we are fostering. Our house is halfway run by them!
Once again, welcome!

Pug hugs, Kelli





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iVillage Member
Registered: 04-06-2005
In reply to: butterflymelt
Mon, 10-30-2006 - 8:41am

Hi and Welcome to the board !!

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iVillage Member
Registered: 04-27-2006
In reply to: butterflymelt
Mon, 10-30-2006 - 8:48am

Hi Harmony and welcome.


BP is definately a rollercoaster ride. Get on meds and try to stay with them. The rollercoaster ride is easier with the meds.


I like cooking too. It is good you are keeping yourself busy.


I look forward to getting to know you better.


Tina




     ~ Tina ~

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-02-2006
In reply to: butterflymelt
Mon, 10-30-2006 - 9:14am

Hi Harmony and welcome to the board. I'm glad you found us. To echo what everyone else has said, the med debate is notorious here. If you can get on a med combo that works, try and stick with it. I know how hard that is to do. It took me a long time to get used to the idea of having to take meds for the rest of my life. I fought it long and hard but finally gave in because I was tired of feeling the way I did when I went off them. As others have said the meds don't always stop the roller coaster, but most of the time make the hills easier to take. That's where finding the right med comes in. I'm still in that phase.


Stick around and post often. We look forward to getting to know you better.


Hugs,
Traci