I am not well...trigs
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| Mon, 10-30-2006 - 7:29am |
I don't know even how to write all this down right now...suffice it to say I'm not doing very well right now...I haven't been for a good month...I feel like EVERYTHING in my life is spinning out of control and I am powerless to "fix" it...I feel very helpless, as I watch my life fall apart again.
Bad weekend...sick as hell...still. Depressed...irritable, anxious, and well you all know the drill...
DH was at my house for almost a week, and things aren't good. He is aggravated. I am the reason my son is so spoiled. Just something else I've messed up. Again.
I have a pdoc appt tomorrow, with the new lady...i don't want to go. But I have no choice, even though I CANNOT AFFORD IT. Its like my last hope right now...
Work is soooo behind...I'm overwhelmed, and in the mood I'm in now, I can't do much about it.
This really sucks.
I went to church yesterday...with a friend. It was a really good church, and I'm going to go back...if I can find it within myself to do so.
I'm just a mess. I've been in this weird mixed thing for so long, I don't know what to do anymore. I'm questioning EVERYTHING. I've gained weight again, and look absolutely disgusting. I want to SI. But my kid saw my last ones, so I can't.
I am so lost.

I'm so so sorry you are still sick.
God could not be everywhere, so
Hey
I am am sorry you are having it bad again. This BP sucks, I know. I am not doing too well either but I am hanging in there.
Do not miss that pdoc appt. You need to go. I know it is hard financially, but you need to take that money and do something good for Keli.
~ Tina ~
Keli I agree with Donna - you need to go back to the doctor and get a really strong antibiotic to kick that crud once and for all. There is no sense in you still feeling the way you do.
As for your pdoc appointment tomorrow, Tina's right, you need to keep that appointment and spend some money on Keli and work on getting better. I know it's hard being it's the new pdoc, but you've got to try.
I know how much it sucks to be where you're at right now. With different circumstances I'm there too. But we've both got to hang in there and see this through. As you told me, you know it gets better. So we'll lean on each other and let the wonderful support of everyone here help us through.
Love You,
Traci
We will make it
I love you
Rebekah