help me
Find a Conversation
help me
| Wed, 11-01-2006 - 1:26pm |
my life is over.
i'm all alone.i'm trapped at the same time.
there is no way out of this life i chose.no one can help me.i envy suicides.
i'm so alone.
i'm not going to give a laundry list of my disasters.they sound almost petty.but its how they make me FEEL.i never feel good.i'm on everything now.antianxiety antidepressants mood stabilizers & i'm still crawling out of my skin.the only difference is that now i can sleep.
i'm all alone.i'm trapped at the same time.
there is no way out of this life i chose.no one can help me.i envy suicides.
i'm so alone.
i'm not going to give a laundry list of my disasters.they sound almost petty.but its how they make me FEEL.i never feel good.i'm on everything now.antianxiety antidepressants mood stabilizers & i'm still crawling out of my skin.the only difference is that now i can sleep.

Hey honey. I'm sorry you feel so bad. Are there any small steps you can take, to help your situation, at all? Anything? Being proactive sucks...but it helps, when you can trick your brain into action...even a little tiny bit of action.
I'm on everything too...and I don't feel good any of the time either...but I know it will get better...eventually. Somehow.
Don't know how...but it always does.
We're here for you, to listen and love and support you.
Hang in there.
Love and Hugs,
Keli
You may be taking to many meds. That happened to me one time
the meds may be working agains't one another. Its worth a
phone call.
Suz...
How much Li are you taking right now???? Have you had labs done yet to check your levels?
((((((((((((((((((Suzi)))))))))))))))))))))))))
Call pdoc, see what he can do. Maybe it is the combo of meds. What meds are you on,the dosages, and how long have you been on them?
I hope you feel better soon.
Tina
~ Tina ~
not a good excuse.
my mother got me on the phone,told me she feels sorry for my children yada yada.
after her brilliant suggestion that i find a job in my kids school(like magic)she decided i should go back to beauty school...did it...hated it & failed my exams miserably.i have no talent in that area at all.
my mother seems to remember i dropped out.didn't.failed.
i only have a bit of money left & i don't want to flush it.i'm 45...who is gonna hire me in the beauty biz anyway?
so she told me off untill i told her i didn't want to hear anymore & i wished she'd just stop TALKING AT me & hiliting all my faults.
i know them by heart.
i'm just counting the days till i can do the big sleep.that's all that's left for me
no i/p WON'T help.being i/p is worse than being home & the conditions are gross & the staff is rude & you have no input into what they give you.
send me to a spa instead.
yep, stop the sedatives...I SO KNOW HOW YOU FEEL! When I was taking Sero recently, I wanted it, craved it...but it made me feel horrible the next day. Really down. I had to flush what I had left and start over.
The difference is amazing.
As for i/p, i'm sorry you don't feel it would help. My psych facility here is one of the best in the country and I always forget all of them aren't the same. It helped me MANY times. But we're all not alike.
You hang in there.
Love and Hugs,
Keli
Suzi,
I feel like I could have wrote your first post. At least my mom doesnt point out my faults and berate me. She should understand that you are sick. I hope you feel better soon.
(((((((((((((((((Suzi)))))))))))))))))
That is very sad that your mom makes you feel so bad about yourself.
Can you tell her to stop talking to you that way?? I mean do you feel strong enough to do that? You don't desreve to be talked to that way.
Suz, what is it you feel you are good at. I know you are good at a lot but what would you like to do with your life? Work, school...what? Just think about it for awhile. You have to do what makes Suzi happy, NOT NOT NOT what makes your mom happy, forget her, it isn't her life.
I went to beauty school too and failed. I love doing hair and make-up. I did all my friends hair and make -up when I was growing up. I started cutting hair when I was 13 and I still do it but I am not licensed. My dad had just died and I couldn't handle 9 hour days, 5 days a week at 18. I didn't have the support I needed to get through it and I was deeply depressed. You don't have the support you need to make it and you are very depressed. Lady, we have to get you better.
You can succeed at what you want to do. First you need to find something you want to do. Be realistic and don't try to do something to big at first.
Are you taking any ME time yet? Do you get your hair done? Nails? shopping? Take a bubble bath, anything? That is a good place to start.
Are you going to tdoc appointments?
Hugs,
Tina
~ Tina ~
I take Kyprexa and zoloft and a sleeping pill at night.
I'm am new a this bipolar. Before I was adhd, personality
disorder and manic depression. Thats why I'm glad I found
this web site, so maybe I can get some insight. Also, I
need to find a new pdoc, can afford mine anymore, need to
find one that my insurance will pay for. thanks kelli
ps.s what are test? for what?
shelia