How do you ....

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-14-2003
How do you ....
2
Mon, 11-06-2006 - 12:14pm

tell someone you just dont want to be touched or bothered. I am still in deep depression and I dont want to be touched at all not even by my bf. In fact when he touches me I just get more irritated. As you can imagine this has not done anything for our relationship. My bf is a cop and he is going to go out to patrol real soon. It is patrol training for 6 months....think boot camp. What is the best way to say something. I dont want to alienate him but it almost seems that I cant help myself. He is probably the best bf that I have ever had considering how he treats me and respects me. He would be the marrying kind but right now I dont even want to be alive much less carry on a relationship that might lead to marriage/kids which right now I dont see myself having. I dont want to lose him and I really do care about him.

I have tried showing him the symptoms of bi-polar II on the web and I have encouraged that he knows more about it. It is hard to explain to him how I can be one way one day and something completely different the next. He hasnt had the time though to look up the disorder because of this patrol thing, he has been busy preparing. He doesnt know much about bi-polar especially since he doesnt know of anyone who has had mental issues.

Sorry for rambling.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-11-2006
In reply to: alexxia77
Mon, 11-06-2006 - 12:38pm

WOW....that is a tough one. I don't know if there is a "good" way to say that without causing hurt, even if none is intended. How soon does he leave on this "patrol"? I know before I went into military boot camp I wanted to be with my fiance as much as possible, wanted the physical closeness, but I am a physical touch type person anyway with eobp adding to the sex drive....he probably is wanting some closeness with you seeing as he is going to be gone for six mo. Is he going to be gone or does he get to come home everynight or weekend or what? Maybe you can stick things out until he goes on patrol and then when he gets back, maybe he will have some time to do the research he needs to do. Also, you may be able to find the meds, or whatever, to bring you out of your depression. It also may take you finding the stuff and printing it out for him to read....certain things DW has had to do that with me for me to finally take the time and read it. Even with the trying to get ready, I would hazard a guess, that if he is who and what you describe him, then he would take the time to read something if you printed it out for him to read. It may be the looking it up or just plain reading something on the computer. I am that way, sometimes I do better reading something on paper, rather than trying to read it on the computer.

Don't know if I helped any....Good luck,
tk

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iVillage Member
Registered: 04-27-2006
In reply to: alexxia77
Mon, 11-06-2006 - 9:07pm

That is a hard subject. See I am the touchy feely type, not overboard but I am an affectionate person. Like when I am talking to someone, even people I just met, I will

     ~ Tina ~