Meeting with my prof's head honcho
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| Mon, 11-06-2006 - 4:47pm |
Well folks, my dropping out of school was not the end of my U Buffalo story. Shortly after I sent the email tendering my resignation to the prof and a copy to her superior, the superior emailed me and said she wanted to talk to me, saying she found what I said "serious." She asked for some explanations, which I offered in as matter-of-fact and positive manner as I could manage. She said that though that prof likes to crack the whip on her students because she considers herself the "gatekeeper of the profession." She said I would probably get the B's I needed, and that the situation with her never grading papers on time would improve, too.
I haven't really made up my mind, but I am leaning towards not going back. As a bipolar person, I am fragile! I don't respond well to prof student-bashing, no matter how well-intentioned. An interesting thing about that prof is that her superior intimated to me that that prof's husband and daughter were also bipolar, so she actually understood me pretty well. That may be true, but I guess I might be different than her family members...
For now, I am looking at small colleges with academic programs that aren't so cutthroat. I think I may feel more secure at one of those places. And besides, I really won't save any time going back to U Buffalo anyway. Any way you slice it, I've got a two year commitment ahead of me, if not more...
Express (and thanks for reading!)
Beth "Petrouchka"

I am glad your prof's superior took you seriously even though you are planning on going another direction. The professor my have bp family members but that doesn't mean she is compassionate. She may push them too. I hope everything works out for you with your new plan. I know what you mean about being fragile. I am at school because it is very hard for me and I do give my all, so if I have a professor, which I have had, give me a harder road, I can't hack it. What is funny is I had this Professor named Dr. Hack. She was a B. She definately hacked her students. We started in a big audotorium(sp?) with stadium seating. There must have been 200 students in her class. I tried so hard to keep up. Everyday the class got smaller and smaller. Finally, I said enough is enough and I dropped the class. When I left there was maybe 35 students. The was Biology. I took it again the next semester with a different Professor and got a "B". It was still very hard BUT I had a prof who worked with you and helped you. A fair Professor. My favorite classes in college has been Anatomy &
~ Tina ~
Beth, it sounds like you did a great job talking to the superior. Congrats! That could not have been easy.
Of course you have to do what feels right to you, but are you sure you want to leave the school over this? My understanding of universities is that the superior's reaction is very rare. My experience has been that professors stick together and back each other up. So, it seems that the superior thinks you have some solid criticism of this professor, and she doesn't want to lose you. I know you feel fragile, I used to feel that way all the time, too. I have been genuinely shocked to find that I feel that way less and less as I get older and force myself through challenges. Could you at least finish off the classes you've started this semester? Perhaps if you can get through this class you will get a sense of achievement that will help you through your next challenge, maybe with a difficult child in a classroom, or worse, difficult parents of one of your students.
If you feel that you'd prefer the small college environment, then by all means transfer next semester. However, you said in a previous message that you thought your lesson plan was some of your best work. Why not keep doing the work to the best of your ability for the rest of the term, and don't let one little number on the page change your mind about the quality of your effort. (I'm assuming that it's too late to get your tuition back or withdraw without seeing a 'W' on your record.)
OK, well, that's what I'd like to think I would do in your situation, but I have certainly decided there were times I could do without any challenges!
Best of luck on your decision,
Cari