HELP!!! DD JUST FREAKED ME OUT!!
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| Tue, 11-28-2006 - 9:28pm |
well i'm for sure freaked out! My dd that is 15 just told me that she has been thinking about having sex... You know that I have a 20 year old, but she is so much different than my 15. I never had to worrie about anything like this with my older one. And just think I've got one dd that is just 6 months. So I'm not really sure what to say or do. I can't tell DH he will FREAK PLUM OUT. aND HE MOVES HEAVY EQUIPMENT, SO IS i TELL HIM i WILL HAVE TO WAIT TILL HE IS GOING TO BE HOME A FEW DAYS. bUT i GUESS SINCE SHE TOLD ME THAT i SHOULD GET HER AN APPT. WITH MY obgyn, SHE IS FEMALE MAYBE SHE CAN HELP US. i TOLD tAYLOR THAT IT'S NOT WISE TO DO THAT AND USED SOME OF OUR FRIENDS CHILDREN THAT HAD TO GET MARRIED CAUSE THEY WERE pg,oh my god,,,
I know I' rambling, thanks for listing.
I'M FOR SURE FULL BLOWN MANIC, THANK GOD I SEE MY PDOC SAT AT 12:30
tHANKS
Shelia

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Good morning Sheila! I went through this with my 19 yo dd when she was 17. I vowed not to be like my mother before me whom I couldn't talk to and just kept her head in the sand. So I took my dd to my GYN and they talked to her, did an initial exam, put her on the pill, and still stressed the importance of condoms as prevention for any STDs. I had to keep up appearances and keep my mouth shut because it was killing me to even think she was having sex or wanting to! I felt physically ill. So after I did my responsible part and set her up, I went into denial!! :)
You can't fight nature but it's hard nonetheless!!
Good luck to you and your DD!
Pug hugs, Kelli
PS - just an FYI, but All Caps in messages means screaming - I didn't know if you knew that?
Hey Sheila,
I have a ds, who is 16. He went through sex ed in elementary school, yes that early. So he knew about condoms. Well, I have never sheltered my child, ever, so he knew about sex from an early age. About a year ago, he came to me, and told me his "hormones" were raging out of control. He now has condoms of his own. I do not know if he has used them or not, but he knows about safety, and pregnancy prevention.
Better safe than sorry. Like Kelli said, I'm in denial.
My mom took me to the ob/gyn when I was 15 too. I did the initial exam, and got bcps.
Good Luck.
Love and tons of hugs,
Keli
Shelia,
My dd is 17 and is sexually active with her bf. She first had sex when she was 15 and I flipped out inside. I was there for her and put her on birth control and gave her condoms...in case the boy didn't have any. She is now on Nuva Ring.
I worry a lot she will end up pregnant. I will be the one taking care of her baby, IF, she gets pregnant before she is ready and I really don't want that responsibility. I talk to her a lot about being responsible. You can't stop your kids from having sex. If they are determined to do it they will. Just keep communication open and give her the information she needs to be responsible.
Good luck,
Tina
~ Tina ~
Hi bigs...
First take a deep breath and step back.......There now..The most important thing is to be calm. She said that she is thinking of having sex. Thats completely normal. She is growing to adulthood and it makes sense that this would start to happen( whether we like it or not) taking her to the gyn is a good first step. But remember its your job to keep her informed and the lines of communication open. The fact that she came to you shows that you have been doing that.
Ask her:Why is she in such a hurry? Does she think she is emotionaly ready? What does she think having sex is? Does she have someone in mind? Is she prepared for the after effects of sex? The ups and downs of being sexually active at a young age? Find out what she already knows/her opinions and then go from there.
While informing her about condoms, birth control and other things are important. Its also important that she be as emotionally ready as possible. Sexual intercourse is the last thing that ties young people to being children. And IMHO this society hurries them past that phase of life where they can just that. Children.
I hope it all works out and please let us know what happens... Best wishes.
Hey girls,
Thank you all for your input! I feel so much calmer in reading everyone's posts. And KELI thanks I didn't know all caps meant screaming! But I do know.
I just got off the phone from my obgyn, her appt. is Jan 4. We have been disussing putting her on the pill since last year, because her periods are really bad, and they do not come ever month. But last night she mentioned having sex with her boy friend. She only goes to church since progress reports came out, cause she has been grounded for 2 C on her report card. She has always been on the honor roll. So I will take her on the 4th and get her on the pill. Yall are right if its goning to happen it will. And, yes its good to keep communication open. Which we are pretty good at. Thanks a bunch, Me not having a mother to ask these questions, you girls done a wonderful job. Thank You!!!!!
Shelia
Well, be thankful she came and talked to you about it!!!! I would hope my DD would come to us when that time comes. I am a of the opinion that all we as parents can do is give advice and hope some of it is heeded and hope some of our raising has stuck. I do believe in todays world that pre-marital sex is practically a given and teenage sex is not much lower. DEFINITELY get her in to an OB-GYN, they have a vaccine for HPV now for those girls who have NOT been sexually active before, and calmly discuss your objections to her having sex that young, yet also have a discussion with her about her options for birth control and stress condoms for disease prevention. I know it may be rough and a bit daunting, but leaving her with NO info is a sure way to having a pg DD WAY to young or with an STD JMHO. Also IMHO, giving her all the info available DOES NOT lead to sex any younger....and you talking with her woman to woman may give her the confidence to say no, knowing you have the confidence to leave the decision to her.
I intend to treat my DD in this manner, check back with me in 8 more years and see how well I do. LOL. That country song "I Loved Her First" already chokes me up now, but I also know that day is coming so we will see.
Good luck and keep us posted for those of us who have yet to cross this bridge with our DD's.
tk
Hey thanks for mentioning the HPV vaccine - I had totally forgotten about it!
Need to know as I have a 7 yo dd - SIGH!
Pug hugs, Kelli
Yep, have an 8 yo right now and I haven't even discussed with DW if we want to do this now or wait a few years. I was thinking we could wait a few years, I have already forgotten what the few articles I read have suggested.
tk
ugh...I had all this typed out and someone came to my desk and I had to dump it (gggggrrrrrrrr).
anyways....I was going to mention the vaccine also, but I thought you said she already had sex.
God could not be everywhere, so
Hey girls, Thanks again, what exactly is the vaccien, what does it do. I haven't never heard of it. But I will be sure and mention it to the doctor. And, again I love this board and all the wonderful people. I feel so much better.
Tks
Shelia
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