I know this has been discussed before...
Find a Conversation
I know this has been discussed before...
| Sun, 12-17-2006 - 8:47pm |
but I don't have the patience right now to find it (I'm pretty restless right now).
I was wondering how you gals (and tk) handle your anger/rage/outbursts, especially with/toward your children. I swear I am going to set up a counseling fund instead of a college fund for my kids-especially ds. I lost it today and said some pretty horrible things to my son. He has really been struggling lately and today I just couldn't take it anymore. I've been getting more irritable over the past few days so I knew it was coming but just couldn't stop it. I hate myself when I yell at the kids, especially ds.
Anyway, if you have anything that works for you to manage your anger, I'd love to hear it. Maybe I just need a med change.
Thanks,
Peg

Sorry to see you are still having such a rough time with the anger issues. I have been there along time ago and it isn't fun. Unfortunately, this anger you have is hurting your children very much and you. Have you thought about anger management classes? I would definately check into it. It would be worth it for you and your kids to not have this destructive behavior in your life. You could also need a med change but alot of anger issues need to be tackled with behavior modification. I know you have been struggling with this and I hope you are able to get it under control soon. You need some coping skills and that is where professionals in anger management classes can teach you them. Just a thought. Also, do you talk to tdoc about this? Does he/she have any help to offer you with this issue? You need support on this. You are teaching your kids this is how to be and handle things. I know you don't want to do this to them. I know you love your kids. I wish I had some magical answer for you to make it all better now.
Good luck.
Tina
~ Tina ~
Hi Tina,
Thanks for your response. I have not looked into anger management classes. Actually, this WRAP program is helpful with brainstorming ideas. I'm just looking for other suggestions to add to my tool list.
I do discuss this with tdoc and she has given me some coping skills to help out. I am trying to break an abusive cycle that I was brought up in. Yelling is the only thing I was taught to do.
I was actually doing very well for the past few months. As my mood is shifting, I am aware enough to notice that my anger is starting to rise; something I was never able to do before. I see pdoc tomorrow so I will discuss this with him, too. Often times a med change helps get me leveled out, which alleviates the impulsive anger. My anger is not constant; I can be totally fine then just snap, then be fine for the rest of the day or for the rest of the week.
I know there is no magic answer to this. I was just hoping I could add some new coping skills to my WRAP list. I'm trying to be an active participant in my recovery. I will look into anger management classes in the area (I'll ask pdoc and tdoc this week if they are familiar with any).
You said you were in this situation a long time ago. Did you attend anger managment classes or were you able to change your behavior on your own?
Thanks again for your reply!
Peg
Peg,
You are really working hard. Pat yourself on the back for that! It isn't easy to change bad behaviors, it takes time. That is great you are doing WRAP and working with your tdoc and pdoc on this. Keep doing what your doing. It will all work out.
You are able to now see when your anger is rising. You are growing and you will continue to because you want to. I am glad you see your growth. It helps to pat ourselves on the back when we make accomplishments. We are so good at putting ourselves down when we make a mistake. Acknowledge the mistake and move on to using your tools you have so far.
I didn't go to anger management classes. My counselor at the time dealt with anger issues alot with being in the YWCA domestic violence counseling center. I didn't go to her at first for domestic violence but later realized how abusive my ex was and how I had to leave him. It was destroying me. I grew up in an abusive household(dad was an alcoholic and beat my mom) and then I met my ex and he was verbally abusive and neglectful in meeting my needs. I was molested by my brother
~ Tina ~
However BP seems to change a person quite a bit.
I notice that my anger outbursts occur almost exclusively during my depressive episodes.
I know from talking to others that many have anger problems during manic episodes.
If you notice the anger occuring just during the episode, then a med change will likely help.
Anger Management would likely help either way, as the techniques could be used whenever you are cognate enough to realize your anger is rising.