BP & I'm cranky!
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| Mon, 01-29-2007 - 9:41am |
Let's see, I can ONLY attribute my current mental state to BP because it doesn't make alot of sense.
I posted awhile ago that my meds were making me feel...over-medicated, I guess is the best I can describe it. Kind of like I wanted to just sit on the couch and stare. So I did what any reasonable person with BP would do...I stopped taking them! My BP tends toward mania rather than depression and I'm comfortable with the mania, or at least more comfortable manic than I am either zombie-tired or depressed.
OK, so today I'm in my office, a couple of my cases are "problematic," lets say. Issues I don't want to deal with. I'm tired. I immediately think I want to close down my practice and do "something else." No idea at the moment what the "something else" is.
I have to wonder why I can't just keep those few files in perspective and not absolutely suddenly hate my job and want to quit. No perspective whatsoever.
So I'm sitting in my office almost at the point of tears because I don't want to be here. I already have 10 voice mail messages and a stack of mail. Fortunately, I only have court appearances one morning this week and its otherwise quiet. The thing is that I KNOW I'm blowing this out of proportion.
I go thru this every once in a while when I just don't want to practice anymore. I just think that because of my BP it becomes an extreme situation. I have an appointment to see my pdoc next Monday because we're going to have to start a new med regime. The current one ain't workin' so well. Someone PLEASE tell me you identify. It's all out of proportion and all I can do is keep praying for perspective and clarity.
Thanks for letting me vent! Love, Mo.
| Thu, 02-01-2007 - 3:13am |

