What do you do when

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-19-2006
What do you do when
3
Mon, 02-12-2007 - 1:56pm

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iVillage Member
Registered: 10-10-2006
Mon, 02-12-2007 - 3:00pm

Laura, First your children are NOT better off without you! You are working to make your and therefore their life/lives better. You are not a lost cause!

Would your DH be willing to go to the therapist with you? Or would he go to a PDOC with you. Maybe if they told him what you are going through and that it is not under your control it would help. I've delt with this kind of predjudice myself with my own family. Is there someone else he trusts that he would listen to? Would he be willing to read information about bipolar? These may be the only way to convince him that you are not just trying to blame an illness for your actions.

Mood disorders are caused by a chemical imbalance and not by being lazy. There is only so much that you can control the rest must be done with medication. It can sometimes take years to get the right combination so don't give up. Just keep doing what you are and keep coming back here for support and to vent.
Brenda

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-24-2003
Tue, 02-13-2007 - 11:39am

((((Hugs)))) Laura,

That is really hard to deal with. My DH is mostly really supportive, but he doesn't really get it either. I'm the one that came from the "there's no such thing" family. Oddly, everyone in that part of the family has some sort of mental disorder (bipolar being highly prevalent). However, growing up with that "suck it up" attitude can really affect your outlook. It makes it a real struggle for me to be compliant with treatment when I'm feeling "up" and hard to be completely honest when I'm down. And I'm one that has the problem. I can't imagine how much of a bitch I'd be if roles were reversed. I'd like to believe I'd handle it well, but maybe not. Can you bring your DH to some of your therapy sessions for education? I've brought my DH to pdoc appointments 3 or 4 times in the last year when things were getting off track with him. Sometimes it helps to hear things from a professional.

Mary

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-02-2006
Thu, 02-15-2007 - 1:55pm

((((((((((Laura)))))))) I can only echo what has already been said. You are NOT a lost cause to you or your children! You are trying to make things right by trying to get this illness under control. Don't give up on that. Maybe getting dh to go to a tdoc and/or pdoc appointment is the answer IF he'll go. I know that's probably easier said than done, but it's worth a try.


As for self injuring, the only thing I can say is don't do it. It doesn't solve anything. Yeah, it temporarily eases the emotional pain, but it leaves permanent scars that you have to explain down the road. Plus, it might end up in you having to go into the hospital. I speak from experience on this. My one and hopefully only hospitalization stemmed from cutting, among other things. But the cutting was the last straw.


As for the meds, it's possible they may need to be adjusted. The lamictal takes a while to build up to a therapeutic dose so that one may be left alone. But the other stuff may be tweaked. It's worth talking to your doc about. Keep us posted. And post here anytime you feel like or need to. Someone is always here to listen.


Hugs,
Traci