Breastfeeding Difficulties & PPD

I think my breastfeeding problems are defiantly contributing to my feelings.

My daughter was jaundice at birth, so she had to stay under special lights for the second day of her life. The nurses gave her bottles of formula during that time. She became use to the speedy flow of the bottles and now at 4 weeks I am having to pump and feed her my milk with a bottle.

My feelings of horrible worthlessness are getting worse by the day. I really need help but without insurance the only help I can get is the support of family and friends....which is non-existent. My friends tell me I can call them anytime, but when I do, everyone is too busy, which I understand, who wants to talk to a pain in the butt when they can be doing something better. My husband has completely had it with me and just gets angry when I cry. I haven't showered in 3 days and I really don't care if I do.

I do take care of everything my daughter needs. She deserves the best. I can tell she doesn't love me though. I hope she grows to love me eventually.