Why does/should it matter?? RANT
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|Thu, 07-15-2010 - 11:28am|
Well, I loose my car Friday. That was the last thing of any value I own. Why does it hurt me so much to loose everything? Everyone keeps saying I shouldn't be upset...they're only things. Well I can't help it. I worked very hard for all those things. No one handed them to me. And no one will give us a car loan so it looks like I'll be walking everywhere! Jon leaves next Friday for the military for nearly three months and the kids are going to their uncles in Florida. I don't know what the hell to do about having no car. I feel like blowing my brains out. I hate Jodie, I am not happy with Jodie, and I would like to get rid of Jodie. You guys just don't know how often I've dreamed of being someone else. I want to dump this life and hopefully start over again as someone normal with better genetics. My brother and sister don't have all these stupid mental health issues so why did I get it all dumped on me? Why have I become the family looser? How did I manage to get into this stupid predicament? I'm bone tired of it all and quite frankly sick of dealing with it. I keep waiting for things to get better but they just keep getting worse. It's going to hurt like hell Friday giving back the car I've loved for the last 4.5 years and get nothing in return. It was a very bad idea to lease. Another stupid Jodie mistake.