iVillage VIRGIN! well, make that message board virgin!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-25-2012
iVillage VIRGIN! well, make that message board virgin!!
9
Tue, 09-25-2012 - 12:44am

Hiii! My name is Maddy, but you can call me M =] I am 21 years old, happily married to my husband of 1 year. 21 YEARS OLD & MARRIED?!? you say? eh. I have never really been my age. I haven't really ever been able to keep friends around that are my age either. That's why i have resorted to message boards =\ OH! and you definetly need to know my husband works 2nd shift 7 days a week. that is the reason i am on here haha! I dont really get to see him, and i watch a 16 month old all day, so I just figured this would be a good way to meet some new women, maybe some who were even in somewhat of the same boat as me =] i look forward to talking with you!!

Avatar for hugss
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-25-2010
zebraprntfrapp wrote:

Hiii! My name is Maddy, but you can call me M =] I am 21 years old, happily married to my husband of 1 year. 21 YEARS OLD & MARRIED?!? you say? eh. I have never really been my age. I haven't really ever been able to keep friends around that are my age either. That's why i have resorted to message boards =\ OH! and you definetly need to know my husband works 2nd shift 7 days a week. that is the reason i am on here haha! I dont really get to see him, and i watch a 16 month old all day, so I just figured this would be a good way to meet some new women, maybe some who were even in somewhat of the same boat as me =] i look forward to talking with you!!

Welcome to the board ,
Nice to meet you M .. congrats on your marriage.
Look forward to getting to know you better :smileywink:




Avatar for mrosie
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-23-2000

Welcome to the board, M!

I'm RoseAnn, married for 16 years to Robert. We live in Colorado. I have a grown step-daughter, son-in-law and 2 adorable grandsons. We also have two golden retrievers who are spoiled rotten.

I got married at 22. Looking back that does seem young but it's worked out well for us. :smileywink:

I look forward to getting to know you here!

RoseAnn

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-25-2012
Thank you ladies for responding! RoseAnn, thank you for the positive encouragement! I have never once doubted my husband and I'd relationship, but it gets difficult when you never get to see them!! so I'm glad to hear you have made it to the grandparent stage with your husband :smileyhappy:
Avatar for mrosie
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-23-2000

It can be tough when you don't get a lot of time together but you can use that time to explore your own interests!

We moved from California to Colorado 4 years ago and the transition was tricky for us. I moved first and started a new job while DH stayed behind with the dogs while we tried to sell our house there. It all worked out in the end but those months apart were tough for both (all) of us.

Hang in there!

RoseAnn

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-08-2008

I'm Dee, married 6 yrs w/2 little ones.

My hubby works shift work as well. But he doesn't work 7 days/week, I'd hate that!! We definitely make a huge effort to spend quality time together - it's absolutely necessary in our r/ship.


Welcome,

 

Dee

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2004

Hi M!! Welcome to the message board world. I feel like I have been on and off of iVillage FOREVER throughout the course of dating, getting engaged, then married, etc. etc... 

Your post really registered with me because of your age comment... While I didnt get married at the same age as you, I have also always gotten along with people of all different ages and was one of those convinced I should have been born in another time! Everyone has always called me on "old soul".  

I am 29, and been married for almost 5 years. We moved from Tennessee to California 5 years ago and since all of my family is still there (and most, if not almost all of my friends as well) I use other ways to keep up with people so iVillage is definitely nice :smileyhappy: 

As for the opinion about getting married young... People are going to have opinions, opinions, opinions no matter what you are doing. If you get married young, people are convinced it won't last or think you didn't give yourself enough time to be young. If you wait too long people start the "old maid" comparisons or wonder how old you will be when you "finally" have kids so you need to hurry up cause the clock is ticking, haha. It's just like how everyone says when you are in a relationship people ask when you are getting engaged, when you are married they ask when you are having children, and when you've had your first child, people ask if you are having a second! The questions and opinions never are never going to end so I have found its easier to just get used to it now and try not to care what other people think! 

 





iVillage Member
Registered: 09-25-2012
Clair, thanks for the input! it seems like every single person (women in particular) that I meet now since I'm married and moving on with my own life is way too petty, immature or just plain annoying! lol I have real life problems over here, like 'house payment chicken' as I call it. do I get gas today & risk the house payment coming out of the account at the same time?!? I don't want to hear about how your boyfriend isn't answering your text messages, or some girl at the mall gave you a 'look'. I have yet to find someone who can understand the everyday in's and out's of married life... I don't even expect to talk about anything that has to do with being married.. I just want to have a grown up conversation every once in a while! lol WHEW.
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2004

I completely understand what you are saying, simply because I feel as though I have been on both sides. 

Before I was married I would actually get kind of hurt and annoyed that a good married friend of mine would only talk to me during the day, during the week, and as soon as her husband would come home from work or on weekends, I would hear NOTHING. This is because I wasnt married and was always "single" so nights and weekends were just as free for me as any other day. What I didn't get was this was the ONLY time she got to see and spend quality time with her husband so of course she would want to take advantage (He is a Marine and also deploys about once every other year). I was just single and ignorant to married people's needs.Just like the girls you talk to who just arent in your situation yet and can't really understand. It's truly not their fault, and in their world they are in right now, their problems DO seem big. Instead, I think it's just that you are in such different places in your life, its ok to say to decide not to get too close to them because they cannot relate, and vise versa! 

I have a single friend who is my age but she is TOTALLY understanding that I really only get time with my husband on weekends so she knows we will hang out during the week, usually for happy hours, etc. I have no doubt that if she gets married one day she will be the same way and I know she gets that. 

To me it's kind of like women with children who say people without children just don't get it. Well, they are right! We don't have children yet so we don't understand, BUT I would hope it's not enough that you don't want to hang out with me just because I don't have a child! I love kids and have a friend here who has two and LOVES babies but we still get along great and have a lot in common outside of that so getting together is fun. But I also know and understand that getting together is dependent on when she can get away, either during the work day for lunch or if her husband tells her he will watch the kids and go out and have a girls night.

Friendship is all about understanding where the other person is coming from, and if you feel like most of the girls your age or that you know are just too immature compared to where you are, it's totally cool to try to find older people who understand your situation a lot more! :smileyhappy: 





iVillage Member
Registered: 11-13-2011
Hi M :smileyhappy: I'm Malea. Welcome to ivillage. I'm I'm my 30's now .. But at 21 I was married with two kids. I went on to have a third child and a few years ago divorced. I'm married again and my kids are 19,17 and 13. Time goes by so fast. Anyway I love making online friends :smileyhappy:

www.askmalea.com