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|Fri, 09-28-2012 - 11:50am|
Hey, Freelast2008...how long does it take that old Karma bus to hit an ex? I've been waiting 5 years...
First of all...I want everyone on here to know that no way would I want my ex back just like all of you as he did put me through several years of emotional pain, so figured at some point, he'd get hit by that darn bus! I thought he had the year of our divorce when he got fired from his high paying job after 25 years. My DD26 even said, "Now he'll know what YOU went through, Mom as he was MARRIED to his job." (Our 25th anniversary came and went during mediation.) Anyway, fast forward 5 years...his life hasn't changed a bit, other than the fact that he's STILL unemployed, but is happy living off his wife! They went to Hawaii on their honeymoom (which was the trip I was planning for our 25th) and now, my DD's told me last night that he and new wife are leaving for a 3 week trip to Italy next week! Plus, he still lives in our deam home we built in 1998. I guess I feel a bit meloncholy when I hear things like this as he's still living the life I thought WE'D be living in our 50's once our kids were raised. sigh
Make no mistake...I've moved on and remarried, but my life has changed drastically. Dh and I could NEVER afford a trip like that and we drive used cars. We love camping, but I admit a love of travel and it does make me a bit sad that I won't see some places in my lifetime that I had hoped to see and could have had the ex and I remained together. I guess once the ex lost his job that his life would change as well...and not for the better, but it didn't.
I consoled myself though by remembering the Disney Cruise we took our girls on back in 1999. The ex and I went out to one of the bars on the ship one night and he hardly talked (he's quiet by nature). I remember wishing we'd had other adults around us, so I'd have someone to talk to. I don't have that problem with current dh.
I guess at my age and the length of my marriage, I can't help but remember and think this isn't how my life was supposed to look at this stage. My girls were STILL supposed to be able to come home to the "family" home where mom and dad still lived together (instead of their father and his new wife). sigh
DD25 said to me recently how much my life has changed since the divorce. I've married a man with 3 sons who basically all have mental health issues and substance abuse problems (so constant drama). My past life was much more peaceful except for the emotional pain I endured when my ex decided to "check out" of our marriage.
Oh, well...thanks all for listening and ya all have a great weekend! As me for me, dh and I are going camping so I can finally get a big dose of fresh air! (I work in an office 8 hours every day.)