Drowning in negatives.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2011
Drowning in negatives.
5
Tue, 10-02-2012 - 12:02am

I'm at a point in my life where I feel like there is to many things preventing my from being happy. I constantly have people tell me I'm ungreatful, negative, etc. This just makes things worse...the easiest thing to do is to list whats bothering me.

1. My job makes me miserable and doesnt pay well so I can't quit till I find another one ( I dont like our bills being that tight in todays economy)

2. After my miserable job I go home to feel like a horrible wife cause I cant find enough time to do things like wash clothes, dishes, or even be nice to my husband cause im so miserable and tired from my day.

3. I feel everday I wake up with nothing to look foward to.

4. I miss my family and best friends(that I've had since elem.) they live an hour away but I dont get to seem them often because of my job. I miss having a night out with my girls.

5..  My husband makes more money than me and is talking about getting me a new car but I'm leery of him doing that because he pays for everything else and I feel like my car is the last thing that is just strictly mine and the only thing I have complete say over.

6. Something that always worries me is when my grandparents pass my childhood home will go to the bank and that is the only place I feel truly worried free and happy.

Just little things like plus more bother me. When I tell people close to me I either get the  " ungreatful negative" lecture or they try to put blame on my husband.  My problems extend way beyond him and that just makes me angry that people now days try to drive wedges between married couples. I just dont know what to do I just feel like im blowing along in a horrible storm. Any suggestions tha might help?

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-02-2012
Tue, 10-02-2012 - 12:25pm
You sound like you are dealing with depression. Have a miserable job is not healthly. Keep on looking for another one more to your liking. Don't let family or friends make you feel worse with their negative statements. This only makes you feel worse. If you have not talked to your family doc about what you are going through, you may want to as he may be able to help you in some way. Try hard to keep positive things around you. Plan a girls night out and if you have to, stay over so you don't have to drive all the way back home. I would also talk to your husband as to how you are feeling if you think he will listen. Also, ask you husband to help you around the house, just a little, as you can't do it on your own. He may surprise you. Hang in there and keep us up to date as to how you are doing. take care, Pita 64
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2009
Tue, 10-02-2012 - 3:22pm

Hey,

welcome to the board. You have landed somewhere nobody will tell you that you are ungrateful, negative or a horrible wife. Reading what you posted, I would say what you are is someone is probably suffering from depression and you need help and support not judgement. 

When we are depressed it can be hard to deal with everything life throws at us and in the end l;ife does become a negative process. Do you think you could go talk with your PCP about how you are feeling? Anti Depressants can really help and also having someone to talk things through with.

And we are all here so you can come and vent to us.

Love

Promise



iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2011
Mon, 10-08-2012 - 10:35pm

Thank you everyone for your support. I have been given medication for depression actually it was for anxiety but my mom (a nurse) said it was commonly prescribed for depression. Anyways I didn't take it because I'm im my child bearing years and I didn't want to be dependent on that drug if I were to become pregnant think my biggest problem is I have no support most everyone around me is very "logical" their mind set is it doesn't matter if something makes you miserable if its "what your suppose to do". when I tell ppl my job makes me miserable they say I should be grateful i have a job therefore I should be happy. Im grateful I have a job but IM not happy about being there is very hard to get ppl to understand that.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2009
Tue, 10-09-2012 - 1:15pm

Yes, it can be hard to get people to understand. Depression isn't understood by most people unless they have been through it.

Love

Promise