Need Advice or Opinions Pls!
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|Wed, 10-03-2012 - 8:50am|
Hello everyone - I am new to this board - I lurked all day yesterday but couldnt find any posts relating to my issue. It has been a long time since I have been in a relationship and I could really use some advice here!
I am a single parent of 2 kids (13 and 6). I do not get any help and therefore, I struggle financially. Money is something I am constantly stressed out about. Thats just the way I am I guess!!
I met someone over the summer and we hung out as friends all summer. In August, he approached me about taking things to the next level. I agreed as we had gotten to know each other over the summer and had many things in common. Needless to say, the more time we spent together, the more I noticed that I was always the one spending money and he was never offering to pay for anything. I like my wine and I like to have fun. Well when we would spend time together, he would drink my wine, eat my food, smoke my cigarettes, etc without ever offering to buy or contribute financially. When I talk to him about this, he said he is just struggling right now (he had one week where he did not work and did not get paid and is currently doing temp work) and soon he will be able to contribute. Another week and the same thing of him taking and not contributing. I got really tired of this. A bottle of wine will usually last me a few nights and now it is gone in one night (just to put things in perspective). He was also helping himself to food and drinks without even asking! Then if I tell him that I do not want to see him one night, he goes out - but when we went out together, he claimed he didnt have money to pay.
So I started the discussion and he said I was arguing over "petty things". We have actually had the same discussion 3 times in 3 weeks and nothing is changing and I am starting to feel like he is nothing but a freeloader. To me, money is not petty. I only make enough to support myself and my two children, not another grown adult and this is a very big turn off to me. I guess I just want to hear from others if this is petty and am I being ridiculous? We have been officially together for 6 weeks now and last night I basically ended things because I had told him I was going to do my own thing and I found out he was out (at a bar so spending money).
I am just curious how other people would handle this and if I really am being petty.
Thanks everyone for your thoughts! :