I know this may seem silly....

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-11-2011
I know this may seem silly....
Fri, 10-05-2012 - 9:45pm

But I am fearlessly awaiting my relapse!  Strange I know.  I am not used to feeling better.  Not used to not having that heavy feeling in my heart.  Not used to this feeling at all.  I have felt this before and it didnt last long.  But this time I can feel it is different.  I really hope it stays.  I am working on me everyday.. no doubt about that!  It is just weird.  Dont get me wrong I love it and I am so glad to have this new free feeling.  Just hope it sticks.  I honestly cant explain it.  I even forced myself earlier to try and care about XAP and it just rolled over me.  Didnt stick!  So maybe just maybe I may just have to get used to this.  I like it and I want it to stay!!!


iVillage Member
Registered: 07-24-2005
Fri, 10-05-2012 - 10:28pm

Oh you silly nilly you :smileyhappy:

Get use to!  You said so yourself...it's different this time.

And you know how we can fear something so much that we can actually bring it on.  So stop waiting for a relapse which will never come (see, how positive *I* am about it) and enjoy your new-found freedom!

Silly girl...I love ya



iVillage Member
Registered: 07-24-2005
Fri, 10-05-2012 - 11:00pm

Can we go back to Clairefree?

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-20-2012
Fri, 10-05-2012 - 11:40pm
Lol.. Clairefree it is. I didn't realize i was still using that account. you are right. fear will do that. thanks clarity. I know silly. i have failed so many times before and all it took was one weak moment. i have 5 years of bad habits to break. lol. one day at a time. just glad the heaviness has lifted. Ps on my phone and wanted to not my grammar and punctuation is not this bad. Lol.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-18-2010
Sun, 10-07-2012 - 7:11pm
Enjoy it. Breath. Nice not to be chained to your phone...hang in there momma...let the good take you over...let it ride. Enjoy.
Yo Soy EL Capitan de Mi Vida