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|Sat, 10-06-2012 - 7:10pm|
Hello everyone. I am new here. After many months of soul searching, I joined Ashley Madison about a month ago in search of an affair partner. I won't get into the many reasons I have for doing this, but mainly I realize that I want to experience what it is like to be sexual and intimate with someone other than my husband. My marriage is mostly okay, but sexually, we are not compatible and my many attempts to change it haven't worked.
Anyway, I've been emailing a man I met from AM for several weeks, and after exchanging dozens of lengthy, "get to know you" emails, we finally met last week. There was a great deal of chemistry and we instantly liked each other. We met again this week and made out like teenagers. It was wonderful. We seem to want the same thing from an affair, and it all seemed good. I emailed him the next day telling him that I enjoyed making out and was turned on. He responsed just as enthusiastically, and we tentatively agreed to meet late this coming week (our schedules are both really tight). However, since then - nothing. No communication whatsoever. Over the past few weeks, I've noticed that he does not like to email in the evenings or on weekends (he mostly communicates from work), and he does not like to text. He said he is fine with texting, but he doesn't do it, so that makes me think he is not comfortable with it. I've only texted him a handful of times, and he wasn't very responsive, so I dropped it.
The problem is, I really want to be in an affair with someone who texts me every day (or close to it) and lets me know he is thinking of me and desires me. It might sound needy, but this is one of my needs for an affair - I need to feel desired and want to be told that I am.
Do you think it is too soon to be worrying about this? I feel like I am often the one who communicates first with this guy, and I don't like it. I am not excessive about it at all, but I don't like that I always send him the email or text message first. In fact, after the last time I texted him and he didn't respond, I told myself to back off until he contacted me. It's now been 2 days, and I know I probably won't hear from him again until Monday. I think if he does want me (and he says he does), then he needs to show me. I already feel taken for granted in my marriage, so I don't need to feel like that in my affair before it has even really started!
Am I making too big of a deal about this? I don't want to be a pushy person. He is a nice guy, but I don't want to push him into behaving in a way that makes him uncomfortable. I want him to contact me and text me because he wants to and because he desires me, not because he feels obligated.
How do I deal with this?