How did you feel about getting the diagnosis?

Avatar for Cmmelissa
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-13-2008
How did you feel about getting the diagnosis?
Thu, 10-11-2012 - 12:50pm

I thought this was a very interesting piece from the Today Show, they are discussing whether it's helpful or detrimental to "label" your child with a disorder, here is a link to it if you would like to watch it:

I've seen many times on this board that it's a relief to finally get that diagnosis, you now have a reason behind the behaviors.  I could personally relate to the one comment on the video that parents are relieved to be able to say that it's not the result of bad parenting.    For me, it was also helpful to have an explanation behind his struggles in school and other activites.

On the other hand, they talked about how some parents feel there is a stigma by having the label;  they are worried that their kids will define themselves by the label instead of it just being one aspect of their life.  

What do you think about labels?

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-01-2012
Thu, 10-11-2012 - 6:13pm

I find it helpful to our family to finally have a diagnosis which explains the behaviors but there is still a part of me that questions our parenting - from birth on I felt we did all of the right things, took the right steps, parented positively and then...boom - hat happened!   I also hesitate to tell many people about the diagnosis because of the stigma so many people have - "it's a parenting problem" and "just an excuse for bad behavior" - which I now know couldn't be farther from the truth.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-02-2004

I think it they can be useful, as long as they still fit.  My older son has had his lables change over the years to fit where he is currently at.  Having the correct lable means that we can also treat things the correct way.   (He needed vision therapy....had we just gone the ADHD meds route we wouldn't have seen the improvements that we have now.)    I see as my son gets older that his labels tend to get downgraded, which is really nice.   

I have the benefit of having two other kids (one older, one younger)  without the same issues, so I did not have the issue of fearing what people would think.   I have the same rules and expectations for all of the kids, just one can't sit still as well as the other two and is more impulsive.   People who know us, understand that. People who don't know us, to be honest, I really could care less what they think.   It does help that I also homeschool, so I don't have to deal with teachers as much as most public school kids.   (My kids do take some classes, so some explaination is needed, but not the same amount as if he were in school.)  I might worry a little more about it if I had to have him in the public schools full time.

I see that automatic spell check does not seem to be enabled anymore.   Sorry for my poor spelling.   Hopefully that will come up as a fix in the future!