Wife found out
Find a Conversation
|Fri, 10-12-2012 - 1:45pm|
I am new to the boards - well I have been reading around for a few days and guess only came here because of recent events in my own life and my own affair. Not even sure why I am posting now!?! I suppose to get some support maybe and just to get it down and know I'm not on my own. I've just got in from work and had a terrible day dwelling on everything going round and round in my head.
My affair started a few years ago and just recently his wife found out. I don't know if I should use the abbreviations ! I don't know them all yet! So apologies if I don't . Bascially I think my affair is over and I feel devasted some days, sort of relieved other days and angry as hell the rest of the time. I don't know where to begin in my story or even if anyone is interested to read it enough. It all seems so similar to everyone else in lots of ways. Anyway here goes for some background.....
He and I had lots of contact. Text, phone calls etc etc. He had so many ups and downs with his marriage. I know for sure I would never be the cause of any breakup with them and his life seems so miserable at times. Including huge busts up where he has ended up in a police cell. He always goes back for the children. He will not leave them. She has threatened to leave many times also and says she does not want the children but then threatens to take them off him. They have endless, endless arguments. I'm not using that as a reason or anything or excusing my behavoiur in any way. Or indeed excusing his - I get frustrated that they do nothing about a situation that seemingly they both dislike. She hates him and he hates her.
Anyway cutting to the chase - 3 weeks ago she overheard him on the phone to me late one night. So basically now she knows - although I don't know how much she knows. I spoke and saw him the day after this and since then we have had internet chat contact (generated by me) - more or less my ranting because he hasn't bothered to pick up the phone to me to tell me where I stand although he says he does not want us to end. My head is spinning so much veering from thinking he is a complete sh@t to thinking it must be hard for him at home blah blah. I am sat wondering when or if I will ever hear from him again! He just kept saying "I can't at the mo". Part of me thinks this should end now and I am trying desparately to keep my pride intact. We have not had contact since last monday and I am determined that I will not let myself contact him - beside that is limited now as I cannot text, call or email (she saw an email from me apparently).
Any comments would be greatfully appreciated Just feel sad and lonely and wondering what is so wrong with me that he can't call me to explain. Just a 5 minute phone call. I feel so worthless in all this
Thanks for reading x