More musings re: OLD

Avatar for floridagirl52
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-16-2006
More musings re: OLD
Sun, 10-14-2012 - 8:48am

I can't report any new developments since I went back online about four weeks ago. Just for fun, I have been perusing profiles of men in distant cities by typing in certain keywords (I always thought I'd be a good fit with an architect). I haven't written to any of them.

Anyway, can I just say how weary I am of certain words in profiles: passionate, open-minded, spontaneous.

Open-minded: does this mean I need to be into threesomes? 

And what's with spontaneous? Why is this such a desired trait to claim, or to seek in a woman? If a guy describes himself as spontaneous, does that mean he never plans anything? Is he spontaneous in a good way, like he sees you've been working hard painting a dresser and insists on whisking you away to dinner? I need details!

OK, and the age thing. Yes, we've discussed this. Sooo many men describe themselves as looking younger, and they don't. And many men are of course seeking younger women. Like, a man my age, 58, often puts an age range of 35 - 50 (or starts even younger). I can assure you, when I was 35, I would not have been interested in a 58-year-old. But the ones that puzzle me are the ones who stop a year or two younger. What's wrong with a woman your age? What's the point of a younger woman who is only one to two years younger than yourself? I can understand men wanting someone 10 - 20 years younger, but two? It just seems so silly to me.

But then, I find a lot of OLD ridiculous.

And while we're at it, can we just ban some other words from profiles: easy-going, laid-back, love to laugh, tux. Please, for  my sake, and for all us women out there.


Avatar for floridagirl52
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-16-2006
Mon, 10-15-2012 - 10:19am

have passionate, but only because there so many people out with mismatched passion levels that just cause problems down the line..

I'm thinking you are referring to sex? See, when I see the word "passionate" in a profile, my mind goes to sex, unless it is being used to describe a pastime, i.e., "I am passionate about organic gardening." 

I totally get the concept of matched libidos (and want that very much), but I think getting into anything sexual in your profile or in an email before you even meet is premature, out of place and a total turn off to me. But that's just me.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-1999
Mon, 10-15-2012 - 11:18am

And also if you read something that says that a guy wants a woman who is passionate, doesn't it make you think the guy is  going to be insisting on sex right away w/o any kind of relationship?  I'd like to have hot passionate sex, but I wouldn't advertise it in my profile cause I'd be afraid I'd attract the wrong kind of person--I still have to like the person first, not just do it with anybodyl.

Avatar for xxxs
Community Leader
Registered: 01-25-2010
Mon, 10-15-2012 - 2:20pm

IMO we seem to be afraid of ourselves.  There are people whom we meet that for some reason do not "light our fire" right away.  While there are others who do.  IMO go with the flow.  What is a relationship?  What does that really mean?  Is everyone on the same definition?  Are we placing road blocks in our way? 


iVillage Member
Registered: 01-02-2008
Mon, 10-15-2012 - 2:44pm

I think you are on to something xxs..

I will include myself here but I also see some roadblocks with most of us who post here.. Myself included and that is why I am working on my energy and trying to raise my vibrations.. I am doing the emotional freedom technique to see if I have any love blockages and it seems to be working.. I have had three men from OLD write to me so far.

I have one guy though who lives two hours away and I have one guy who wrote so I gave him my number. Lets see if he calls.

There was another guy who wrote and left his number so I have to decide whether to call or  not..


iVillage Member
Registered: 01-21-2011
Mon, 10-15-2012 - 10:46pm
LOL! This is to very true. It's amazing what you can read between the lines on any sort of profile. I think most posts are purely entertaining reads. If you really want to have fun go check out the Craigslist posts - it's like a sociology experiment.
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