Am I overreacting over woman texting BF?

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-07-2007
Am I overreacting over woman texting BF?
Sun, 10-14-2012 - 10:47am

I just posted about how I trust my BF and now this.  (we are both BS's) Boy I wish I could shut off my brain. 

Anyway, as you all know BF is a contractor and also flips houses.  He is out of state on business and found a foreclosure he would like to flip.  He has been working on it and meeting the real estate person today.  He told me three days ago while he was looking at the foreclosure that a female cop came by and they struck up a conversation…She works for the Crime prevention unit? (Never heard of such a thing) and told him that the area is okay but she would let him know if she hears or knows of anything (Such as crime, thefts, gang activity, etc.) He never told me that they exchanged phone numbers. 

He is coming home tomorrow and told me today that she texted him telling him that if he has any questions to contact her.  I was angry; and he kind of knew that but I changed the subject because I know I have trust issues and didn’t want to start a fight. We made the agreement that we be honest with one another and I don't want him to hide things, but I don't want to be another fool either.

I don’t know if he assumed I knew they exchanged numbers when he told me she would keep him posted on things…To me, I would think it is inappropriate for a cop to text him this information. But I am not up on text etiquette.  He does give out business cards.

What do you guys think? Am I overreacting??? Thanks and God Bless


iVillage Member
Registered: 07-30-2012
Tue, 11-05-2013 - 1:22pm
My husband's emotional affair began with texting. First, it was all about work, then family and friends, then music, then other interests, then personal issues they were each having, etc. At one point and for over a year, they were texting over 600 times each month, 24/7. Not to mention the over 400 phone calls each month...
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-01-2012
Thu, 12-06-2012 - 12:44pm

Not to scare you, but I fell into the trap of texting someone of the opposite sex and it turned into getting familiar, then a texting affair.  I'm not saying to freak out or anything, but it's not a good habit for him to have.  You may want to ask him if he is willing to share the texts with you, but I don't know how to suggest going about it.  Good luck.  I hate to be negative, but I would hate for it to innocently turn into something that he can't get free from, because it causes a lot of pain, and it happens so easily.  Follow your gut! Always!

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-1999
Sun, 10-14-2012 - 12:34pm

Aren't all police in the crime prevention business?  I would think it would be inappropriate if she gave him her personal cell phone no.  I do know there are police officers who give out a business card with their office number on it.  This sounds a little wierd to me that she would be so concerned about a guy buying a house.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-22-1999
Sun, 10-14-2012 - 12:25pm
I don't think I would worry about it. I have heard of a crime prevention unit. They are common in bigger cities. Now if they start texting a lot about stuff that has nothing to do with crime, I might worry. That said I would tell ur BF that you expect to be told if anyone female wise texts anything other than business. And of course you will do the same. Thats about the only way trust will build.