Cross Stitch Wedding Gift

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Cross Stitch Wedding Gift
Mon, 06-09-2003 - 10:33pm
Hello everyone!

A friend of mine is engaged and will be married early next year. I was so excited for her that I cross stitched a small design (5" x 7") to be either framed or inserted in the top of a wedding album. At any rate the design is very simple, a twisted, flowing ribbon shaped like a heart with a rose, leaves, etc. The ribbon then is tied in a knot. In the center I cross stitched the name of the bride and groom and the date of the wedding. It seemed a little "bare" so I added the following two lines, from a traditional wedding vow:

To have and to hold, (this is centered above the ribbon heart)

From this day forward... (this is centered below the ribbon heart)

I had checked the internet for the appropriateness of the above wedding vow and it seemed to be a fairly standard one, used in secular and religious ceremonies. However, I have found out from my friend that she may be writing her own vows and I don't know if I should leave the design as is. It really came out very nice, or remove it completely, or use lines from her vows which I feel are so personal I cannot bring myself to ask her especially since it would ruin the surprise gift and possibly ruin her surprise as she would recite her vows for the first time at her wedding.

Is this an etiquette issue?

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Tue, 06-10-2003 - 10:24am
I don't really think it is an etiquette question. I would not change a thing! The sentiment you have selected is an appropriate one for the occasion, whether or not she uses those words in her vows. You have created something lovely and personal and your friend should be thrilled to get it! Don't worry about the wording.


iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 06-10-2003 - 10:43am
I'd leave it exactly the way it is!!!!!

It's abeautiful momento... with a traditional phrase, regardless of what they "say" in church it will still have the same meaning.

Just wanted to share...

Whenever one of my girlfriends/close family are being married, I make the bride-to-be an embroidered hankie. It's stiched with small blue flowers or entwined circles (marriage symbol), and her monogram. I think it's so much nicer to carry something other than Kleenex in the church (gets all mushy when wet). Most tuck it into or behind their bouquet for easy access!! LOL

There's a poem too:

"A Hankie done in Bridal Blue

Each stich a prayer said for you

To catch the tears that you shed

On the day that you ae wed."


iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2003
Tue, 06-10-2003 - 10:47am
I agree. It's the sentiment that counts. You can't really ask her what her vows are without giving away that you're stitching something, can you? Unless you want to tell her that there's someone on your message board who's getting married and would like some ideas for vows, and could she show you hers?

I'm sure it's lovely, and your friend will just love it.

I'm starting one for a coworker, and it has the names and date and says, "One Heart...One Love". I hope I finish it by August 9.

All the best,

Lee Ann

Lee Ann

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2003
Tue, 06-10-2003 - 2:47pm
I think you should leave the sampler as is. Sounds pretty


The best thing for the inside of a man/woman is the outside of a horse-heard during President Reagan's Funeral


iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Tue, 06-10-2003 - 10:21pm
Thank you everyone for your responses! I shall leave it exactly the way it is. I can't wait to present it to my friend!

Have a lovely day!

Peach Blossom

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Tue, 06-10-2003 - 10:24pm
This sounds lovely! Is there a pattern for it in cross stitch?

Peach Blossom

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 06-11-2003 - 9:19am
Ummmmm, no - there's no pattern.

It's my own design, and everyone ends up a little bit different.

I kinda like it that way.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-30-2003
Sat, 06-14-2003 - 8:48am
I'd leave it as it is. Even if they do not recite these words, the sentiment is appropos.