SPEAKING OF DOGS

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-01-2003
SPEAKING OF DOGS
8
Sat, 03-14-2009 - 6:48pm
TRIP TO WAL-MART

        

       

       Yesterday  I was at my local Wal-Mart buying a large bag of Purina dog chow   

       for my loyal pet, Biscuit, the Wonder Dog and was in the checkout line when a

       woman behind me asked if I had a dog.

                 

What did she think I had an elephant? So since I'm retired and have little to do, on impulse I told her that no, I didn't have a dog, I was starting the Purina Diet again. I added that I probably shouldn't, because I ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.

        

I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it works is to load your pants pockets with Purina nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally complete so it works well and I was going to try it again. (I have to mention here that practically everyone in line was now enthralled with my story.)  Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care because the dog food poisoned me. I told her no, I stepped off a curb to sniff an Irish Setter's butt and a car hit us both.

        

I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack he was laughing so hard. Wal-Mart won't let me shop there anymore. 

        

Better watch what you ask retired people. They have all the time in the world to think of crazy things to say.

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 Pat is  OVER 40 & LOVING IT  and still having fun in THE SANDBOX


 



 


 

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-17-2007
Sat, 03-14-2009 - 6:55pm

OMG that is just TOO funny.

Granny to Caleb and Scotia

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-01-2004
Sun, 03-15-2009 - 12:18am

I love it. So did they really ban you from Wal Mart?


iVillage Member
Registered: 03-14-2007
Sun, 03-15-2009 - 12:49am
LOLOL!!! Silly goose!!!





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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-06-2008
Sun, 03-15-2009 - 9:05am
Speaking of dogs I forgot to mention that we have a new addition to the family at my house. I went out and bought my son a new puppy. Thing is my son has nothing to do with him lol. The puppy is part wiener dog and part minature pincher. When I get some photos I will make sure to post them.
Sandbox accomplishment
My sig.
Sandbox accomplishment
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-09-2007
Sun, 03-15-2009 - 10:54am

Damn!!!

 
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-12-2003
Sun, 03-15-2009 - 12:38pm
Too funny,,,
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-01-2003
Sun, 03-15-2009 - 8:47pm
i don't go into walmart enough to be banned!
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-01-2004
Mon, 03-16-2009 - 5:04pm

How funny!!! I like it anyways!!!