Lousy daughter-in-law

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-13-2005
Lousy daughter-in-law
24
Thu, 07-30-2009 - 2:26pm

Do any of yous have a lousy daughter-in-law , if so I would like to know, so that I do not feel alone in this world with one.  I am a very easy going person, and I love people especially my children/grandchildren and I would do almost anything to make them happy, as when they are happy so am I, but.......now I am loosing my son because of this b---h and I can not do anything about it now, because I have had my limits. 


I really didn't want to post this, because I feel the sandbox is a happy place to be, but I really just want to know if anyone has one of those daughter-in-laws.


So , on that note I do hope that everyone  is well and in good spirits. Have a super duper day filled with lots of sunshine, laughter and lots of fun in the Sand Box.


 


(((((((hugs)))))

Photobucket  Miriam


In loving memory of my dear mother, Rose

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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-13-2005
Thu, 07-30-2009 - 7:36pm

Rusty sweetheart, I have taken the bad for many many years, and now I have had it. I have over looked so much that people just couldn't believe all the crap I was taking. I took it to a certain point because of my son and grandchildren. Now it is just to much. I don't deserve name calling and every phone call is an argument, this is not necessary and it is not called for.

You said, that "our sons have to live with these b^*$%" WRONG, they do not have to live with them, we all have choices in our lives. They stay with them obviously because they want to, and if they don't there is the door. It is called having a back bone which most of these guys today don't have. Too bad it is very sad, but I am not going to pay for her stupidities and nonsense any longer because I am the one that is stressed out and gets sick over all of this. I love my son with all of my heart, but I can not and will not take any more of this.

It is very heart breaking because I miss him and the boys, but my health at this point is a little more important. I can not and will not stress myself out as I have done for many years.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-13-2005
Thu, 07-30-2009 - 7:47pm

Von sweetie, you hit the nail right on the head. " Sounds like she has your son wrapped around her little finger."

Maybe one day he will realize what he is allowing her to do to our relationship, but unfortunately it maybe to late then. I will not live forever and then it will be too late to fix anything.

It is so difficult when we have to deal with family/in-laws and their are problems there. Life is so short and I can not understand why certain people have to make it is hard to get along with others. very sad!!!

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-08-2005
Thu, 07-30-2009 - 10:38pm

(((((((((((((hugs))))))))))))), miriam.


your dil really needs help, but i can see your dh afraid to get her some.


This is exactly what my mom put dad through all his married life. i remember mom screaming into the phone at dads family. My mom could string some words together...let me tell you! then mom and dad would fight about his family. Horrible fight. The kids(my sis and i) sat there and listened.


Mom would call my aunts, my uncle and his wife horrible things. the phrase "tina tina tina...with hand motions that should not be seen by a kid, mom would do because she hated my grandma. My aunts were tramps..ect. you get the picture.


A woman like your dil may be doing the same in her home. this is my guess of a person that can talk to you like that on a phone.


Your poor grandkids...stuck in a home like this. For years i cried for my dad and all he went through. Then a therapist tild me her was over 18 and made his own choices.


You know my one year of phyc says to me she has no self esteme and calls you that because of it. Also she has a screw loose LMBO!! sorry not a laughing matter, i know.


no you didn't go on too long. vent...it is what has helped me!


((((((((((((((((hugs)))))))))) i will watch my emails...but sometimes i forget for a day or two...bad me, so be patient. (((((((((((((hugs)))))))))))))

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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-13-2005
Fri, 07-31-2009 - 7:56am

Thanks Glenda for your patience ,understanding and your support. It is just a terrible

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-08-2005
Fri, 07-31-2009 - 11:16am

((((((((((((((((hugs))))))))))))))


your right self esteme or not...your dil needs help. well son and dil need marriage councelling too. so sad that she is so controling.


Why does life have to be so hard. I wish everyday for some respect and nobody need to talk to someone like your dil talks to you.


My inlaws talk to me like that , and worse. It is like they were never taught anything. A lot comes from selfishness and thier drinking.


I have never told anyonew this, but when we went to my parents just after dad died, a guy came in the door. Thats right...no knocking. He stopped when he saw me. I hadn't been home in years( for good reason, but nobody would take mom home, so i did). He asked where dad was. mom broke the news to him. without missing a beat he said( to my mom) Onagh...don't you wish now you wouldn't have talked to bruce the way you did yeasterday? He didn't deserve that. he went on to say how she had embarassed him.


I was in shock! This guy was a day late and a dollar short. Didn't know weather to b him out for it..being dad just died, or turn to mom and say...you did what! i kept my mouth shut. way too sad! Words hurt, and can't be taken back!


Now if you dil could understand that

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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-13-2005
Fri, 07-31-2009 - 11:56am

I have told my dil many

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iVillage Member
Registered: 12-12-1997
Fri, 07-31-2009 - 12:19pm
Miriam, my heart goes out to you. I can feel the heartache in your post. I wish there was something I could say that would help, but I don't know what that would be.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-13-2005
Fri, 07-31-2009 - 1:35pm

Ann sweetheart, thank you so much for you kind words and your compassion. Unfortunately there in nothing that you or anyone else can say or do to make this situation better or make me feel better.


My younger son has a wonderful girlfriend, with a little girl of 4 years old. She is from a previous marriage, and they have no children together, though he considers that little one his. His girlfriend calls me quite often and we have beautiful conversations and the little girl when she speaks to me, calls me grandma. Adorable!!!


My daughter's first husband always had the highest respect for me and my husband , there was nothing he would of done at that time for us. Mydaughter is now with some one else, and this man is soooooo wonderful to my daughter and her children as well as Destiny Rose of course who is his biological daughter. He too, is always asking if we need something if he is going out, if he sees my husband

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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-01-2003
Fri, 07-31-2009 - 8:52pm

((miriam)) i read thru the posts a bit. my heart breaks for you. i hope someday your son grows a spine and sees what he is doing. he is hurting his

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-13-2005
Sat, 08-01-2009 - 10:03am

Thank you so much Pat, you are so special. I appreciate everyones input on this because I really think that this week I really needed to get this off my chest. I have a very close friend and we speak about this the odd time, and my husband , as well, but I don't like to keep repeating myself as there is really nothing that can be done.


I love my son with all of my heart, but I have always said , he needs to get a back bone. He is missy out on a fantastic family and we are missing out on him and the boys.

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