I'm married, but I have a crush . . .

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-08-2008
I'm married, but I have a crush . . .
Wed, 10-08-2008 - 11:18pm

I have been with my husband for 10 years (dated for 6 years, married for 4 years).  We're happy.  We have the normal everyday stresses - money, work, step-kids, and we can sometimes get on each others nerves, but that's probably a normal thing in every relationship.  We are best friends more than anything else.

I have recently developed a crush on a co-worker.  He's a great guy and is married with kids.  He has been paying me a lot of compliments in the past few months - acknowledging that I have been working out and he says I look great.  He has also made comments when my hair is loose and refers to it as the "take me now look."  I like the compliments & the attention and I know he's not trying to "pick me up" or take things further than that.  Plus, I also think he's cute.  I feel bad having a crush since I am married to a great guy.  I mean I would never act on it or anything.  I love my husband too much and have respect for my husband and myself, so I would never cheat on my husband.  Is this normal to have a crush while you are married?  Also, would you say that the co-worker might have a crush on me since he compliments me the way he does?  To my knowledge, he doesn't compliment any of the other ladies like that. 

I have had dreams about this co-worker; not "wet dreams", but dreams where he has told me that he has a crush on me or that he loves me and it takes me by surprise.  My most recent dream was last night.  It kind of freaks me out in a way.

Let me know your thoughts.  Thanks!

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-31-2003
Thu, 10-09-2008 - 8:48am

Hi ycf79,

Welcome to iVillage.