Terrified; there's no way we can pay

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-06-2007
Terrified; there's no way we can pay
9
Tue, 02-17-2009 - 9:59pm

Hi all -

I am so happy to have found this board. I've been googling and googling and can't find any real help.

My husband and I are in big trouble. He works and I stay at home with our 2 boys (aged 1 and 3; 3rd baby may be on the way, not sure yet). DH's salary is structured so that the annual bonus is about 30% of our pay. In previous years, we have always set money aside from this bonus to pay our MONUMENTAL credit card minimums. We owe about $125,000 in credit card debt - no lie.

Well, guess what. This year DH got no bonus. Nothing at all. His employer says this is due to the bad economy. And there is NO WAY, no way AT ALL, that we can pay any of our monthly payments. We had always used his bonus money for this.

I have no idea what to do. We do own a home, but our mortgage is not significantly more expensive than a rental would be. We have a car, which we make our monthly payments on. But we really have no assets whatsoever. If I got a job outside the home, we'd pay so much for child care that it would not make much sense. DH works LONG LONG hours and he really can't take a second job.

I am terrified. DH is looking for a new job, but the chances of that in this economy are just about nil. What can we do?

PLEASE help,
Amanda

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-17-2003
Wed, 02-18-2009 - 11:21am
Welcome to the board Amanda.
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-01-2008
Thu, 02-19-2009 - 1:59pm

Amanda,

Norma


"Patience is the best remedy for every trouble"- Plautus


iVillage Member
Registered: 07-06-2007
Thu, 02-19-2009 - 2:29pm
Thanks Norma - I look forward to hearing about it. Good luck! This board is such a blessing.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-25-2009
Tue, 06-02-2009 - 10:45am

You sound just like me. We have about 100k in cc debt and about 20k in unsecured loans. We have a home that we pay on and our cars are paid off..not fancy at all..but we need them.

Our minimums are UNBELIEVABLE. This month they went up even.

No matter how many extra hours I try to work or budgeting we do, we still come out in the red and guess what? Our checking is hooked to a cc and when we over draw, they over draft from our credit card...which starts the cycle again.

Tonight, Im going to discuss all this with my husband and start the ball rolling to file ch 13. I dont feel devastated...hopeful in fact. We will still be paying a little, so my moral dilemma wont be as bad, lol. Plus I believe our house and cars will be protected. If taking a hit on the credit report is all that happens for 7 years, thats much better than laying away worrying for the next 30 about if Im going to pay that cc I opened in 1999.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-29-2010
Mon, 09-06-2010 - 10:07pm
I mean you spent that money from the banks so it's dishonest of you to file for bankruptcy, plus you have a husband to support you financially AND emotionally....I'm alone and have no one to talk to but I would NEVER file for bankruptcy because it's dishonest...
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-29-2010
Mon, 09-06-2010 - 10:21pm
Okay first of all shouldn't you use birth control if you can't even pay? Second of all you probably CAN pay...come on there's no way you just spend ALL your money the second you get it...third of all why do you need a house? People who already have everything going for them..having a nice partner and kids..shouldn't ask for more......if you really want to make your payments why don't you just get an apartment instead, rather than being greedy and shallow and holding on to a luxury that many don't have, a house? Also by the way I'm in debt too....and I'm alone....but I NEVER complain....I see the debts as a challenge....not a curse....I should be the one depressed for being alone but I don't see myself complaining like you....
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-16-2008
Mon, 09-06-2010 - 11:49pm

If you don't have anything constructive to offer, at least you could keep quiet. And please get off your moral high-horse, especially after what you admitted, repeatedly, how you earn your living (prostitution).

So what you are alone? Many of us are, and work normal jobs, pay tax, brought up children on our own, and manage to be financially secure. Stop saying that things are easier because someone has a husband (which you did several times over in debt support group), and stop judging unless you want to be judged. May I remind you what you yourself put on your profile:

most embarrassing personal moment
almost being caught by cops for shoplifting

May I also remind you that you said you have a trust fund, and are taking money from your parents still, and, and ...

I have made my share of mistake and am far from perfect, but at least I never had sex for money or stole from people.




Edited 9/7/2010 12:02 am ET by demontespan
Avatar for sullengurl
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-16-2004
Sat, 09-11-2010 - 7:49am

I think she is just a troll. I would ignore as much as possible.



JMHO.

 


 



iVillage Member
Registered: 10-01-2008
Tue, 09-14-2010 - 2:30pm

I'm horrified at your reply to this person after some people have went out of their way to offer you some good financial advise.

Norma


"Patience is the best remedy for every trouble"- Plautus