Adoption?

Avatar for cl_phocid
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Adoption?
15
Sun, 02-19-2006 - 1:23pm
Has anyone on this board ever adopted a child?

All my best,
Danni

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-29-2003
In reply to: cl_phocid
Sun, 02-19-2006 - 3:22pm

I have no personal experience in adopting - but I've done loans, as a loan officer, for people to pay for adoption fees.

                            

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-09-2004
In reply to: cl_phocid
Sun, 02-19-2006 - 3:22pm
I don't have experience in this area but there is a board on a different forum I frequent that is all about adoption. It's got a smallish membership so you get lots of good concentrated information (feels really community-ish too). PM (send an email) me if you want the link. I know the ladies there addressed this issue before.





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cl-tiffany10605


Community Leader
Registered: 03-17-2003
In reply to: cl_phocid
Mon, 02-20-2006 - 4:43am

Yes indeed, but I would not recommend going into debt. No way. Um mmmm. I disagree with going into debt. Starting off indebted is just going to further add to the stress of becoming a parent. Find out what the cost will be to adopt and then add to that all the money just to bring home a baby, then the first year cost to feed, cloth, provide all health care (check-ups, immunizations, etc. and pray there is not a major illness that will tilt a budget) for the first year and that will give you a target amount to save for. But to sink into debt in order to adopt is not something I recommend.

Carolyn

Avatar for cl_phocid
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: cl_phocid
Mon, 02-20-2006 - 8:39pm
Tiffany - thanks for the link and the email.

All my best,
Danni

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-24-2004
In reply to: cl_phocid
Mon, 02-20-2006 - 10:35pm

We couldn't have kids and never adopted because we frankly didn't have that kind of money. Most places we talked to didn't allow you to have debts...well not alot, and they also demanded that you have at least $10,000 in a bank account to cover the cost of raising the child for the first year. Catholic charities wanted the mom to take off for the first year to provide a stable home for the kid.

Talk to some agenices and find out their requirements for income. You really don't want to borrow money and then find out that they frown on that sort of thing. It would be best to find out before what they expect.

sweetpea

sweetpea
Community Leader
Registered: 03-17-2003
In reply to: cl_phocid
Tue, 02-21-2006 - 12:48am

sweetpea I have to applaude you for your courage.

There is a whole lot more to it than sinking into debt. If one must sink into debt up front, well if one has to borrow their money they probably look skimpy on paper with a meager bottom line.

A lot look like this:
One line for income.
Numerous lines for outgo.

Assets. Got investments? T-Bills or funds which proves you know how to manage your money (like you have a cushion you can tap instead of draining equity from your house which = increasing your financial liabilities ).
Any retirement accounts (social security doesn't count) with healthy 5 digits?
Savings accounts (helps to demonstrate you successfully save now and can do so for your child).
Checking accounts.

Liabilities.
List your mortgage(s).
Now list the Home Equity Line of Credit.
List your credit card debt.
List your student loan debt.
List your auto loan debts (all of them)
List any other consumer debt.
List your tax liabilities.

Now look at your bottom line. These are things they look at.

Then the home interviews, background scratch 'n' sniff and in depth scrutiny.

Yes, definitely worth it to scope out the entire process and realistically see what it entails before taking out loans. There'll be plenty of times to sink into debt once you are a parent. You'll probably be taking out Parent PLUS loans when baby hits college and chances are you'll still be paying off other debt you have to incur up front just to pay to adopt and during the first 18 years of baby's life, especially if DINKs drop down to one income and their assets are zip to scant.

There is a nice website to read about getting your family finances in order at http://www.babycenter.com/pregnancy/prebabyfinance/index/

Another great post. It has me thinking maybe we ought to start something about rebuilding your personal finances and what the entire concept is about. Those taking advantage of the Fresh Start are usually eager learners huh.

Carolyn
A Mom and A Working Professional

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-10-2005
In reply to: cl_phocid
Tue, 02-21-2006 - 1:03am

Well... I can tell you this... saving money now is a good idea because after you acquire the child you will see that savings dwindle quickly. And, don't worry about the debt, you will go into debt soon enough when raising a child. The cost of raising a child from birth to the age 18 (not counting college tuition) can be anywhere from $2 - 500,000.00.


Believe me, I speak from experience... I was a single parent who raised four children by myself for fourteen years. It isn't easy and it takes a lot of sacrifice. and savings? Save and invest while you can now...


tg

Avatar for cl_phocid
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: cl_phocid
Tue, 02-21-2006 - 8:53am
Thanks for the info sweetpea.

All my best,
Danni

Avatar for cl_phocid
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: cl_phocid
Tue, 02-21-2006 - 8:55am

Carolyn,


Thanks for the babycenter.com link - lots of terrific info that I'm sure will help us with many of the decisions that we have facing us in this very exciting and hopeful time of our lives.


Much appreciated.

All my best,
Danni

Community Leader
Registered: 03-17-2003
In reply to: cl_phocid
Tue, 02-21-2006 - 9:45am

It's expensive and not easy to adopt but who else are you going to spend your money on? No one is more important than my kids. No one. The youngest is 18, away at university back east (pricey private university, but top school according to U. S. News & World Report's annual list and has the major he wants), and the Valentines Day cards and gifts remind me how much I love them and would do it all over again in a flash. I stayed home for a while, jumped off the fast track, trouble is employers seem to feel you lose one (1) I.Q. point for each day you stay at home. After a few years I returned to work and it was not problematic. I did not miss the "firsts" and have no regrets.

One thing about parenthood, you learn you can do all sorts of things you thought you couldn't. Our greatest teachers can be our children.

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