Need a friend who understands.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-19-2003
Need a friend who understands.
5
Mon, 04-21-2003 - 9:16am
Hi. Let me start off my saying how thankful I am to have found this site. I have been searching the web and was starting to give up hope that I could find others to talk to about my worries and concerns over finances and the future.

My husband and I are waiting for a phone call regarding refinancing our home. Hopefully we will hear soon. We have $25,000.00 c.c. debt, which we want to get rid of. I am disgusted with the fact that just a year ago, our debt was only 2,000.00 (because we paid of a HUGE amount of debt with money given to us by my family). NOW, we here we are, getting ourselves in the hole again. I am the type of person that either can spend money like its going out of style OR I will act like a MRS SCROOGE, and freaks out about spending .02 cents.

I am very disappointed in myself and have started writing in a journal about about why and what I plan to do about a budget, so that this NEVER happens again. I also try to write about the things that I am grateful for ( My 3 beautiful children, a house that I love, family & friends ). Bottom line ~ Very worried but trying so hard to stay positive.

Well, thanks for listening to my little story, (although there is a lot more to it.) I actually feel a little better just writing this all down.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 04-21-2003 - 10:02am
Hi there and welcome. I know how you feel, we have debt and it's the same amount as yours adn it eats me up inside day in and day out. Right now I'm working at nights, taking care of our two children (3 & 4) and than babysitting a 1 year old during the day, just to try to get out of this mess. I think it's great your working on a budget that is a HUGE step in my book. Stay around you'll find great support and great ideas.......

Corinna
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-19-2003
Mon, 04-21-2003 - 10:46am
Thank you so much for the welcome & support. It means a lot to me !! Hopefully with all the hard work and positive attitude that we give out, will help us get to a "better" place in our lives. I have found myself so overwelmed and stressed that I end up just spending more money, because I give up. I know that this cannot continue and hopefully this site and talking with others will have me achieve my goals. I hope this for you as well !!

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2003
Mon, 04-21-2003 - 3:03pm
Hi and welcome to the board. Congratulations on taking control of your finances. Keeping a journal on your thoughts is a wonderful way to know WHY you are spending (works for food too!!)

I just want to stress to you, PLEASE make sure you will not run up your cc balances again once your re-financing goes through. This happens to lots of people.


In my own case, I am too afraid that I will do that so I have never wrapped my cc into another loan. For me, repayment has to be *painful*, such as being cheap, going without etc in order for my debt repayment to *stick*. Right now I have nearly enough money in the bank from two different bonuses this year and tax return to pay back my cc debt, but I know if I pay it off like that, I know (in my case)I'll regret it because I'll start to charge again. (Plus I like having an emergency fund).

However, the good news is, many (probably most) people are not as weak-willed as myself and rolling cc debt into mortgages or HELOC seem to work just fine. Many of the ladies here freeze their cards or just cut them up. Good luck to you and thanks for letting me post my concern. Let us know if the refinancing went through!!!

Avatar for cl_phocid
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 04-21-2003 - 3:10pm
Welcome and thanks so much for posting! I think you're on the right path with journaling - you will discover trends and patterns over time if you keep it up. I often find that my spending habits are tied to my mood, or even to how much money I have at a particular time.

This is a great board with wonderful people who will provide much-needed support!

All my best,

Danni

All my best,
Danni

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-19-2003
Mon, 04-21-2003 - 4:10pm
Wow, thank you all for your responses. Its so nice to hear from you. As far as making the same mistake, luckily my husband has been awesome at turning around and helping me with bills. He & I have made it a point to keep each other informed of how and when money is spent. I will always have a worry, I think, that debt can build again, but I have to have faith that I can finally work things out for the best. For now, I just wait to see what happens with the refinancing and to set up some new savings accounts (part of our new plan)

Thanks again everyone for your support, It means so much to me !!!