Not in the Christmas mood?

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2003
Not in the Christmas mood?
7
Fri, 11-26-2004 - 5:15pm
I am wondering if there are others out there, like me, who are just not in the mood for Christmas this year? If so, what are you doing to try to get in the mood? This has been a very rough year for me on so many different levels...yesterday was sad for me because it was the first Thanksgiving since my Mom passed away, and I used to spend all day helping her cook..it was our favorite holiday. But with Christmas, I am just thinking it is more money to spend...except for buying for our kids and our niece and nephew, it just isn't fun anymore. I just don't feel like doing anything. Worse is that we just moved and I haven't tried to find a church yet... Anyhow, just wondering if I am alone in feeling this way...
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-18-2004
Fri, 11-26-2004 - 5:30pm

I'd say you are far from alone in your feelings. I just can't seem to "get into" the holidays this year. DH and I are about to start decorating the house and I am dreading it, especially because DH has been in a bad mood all day.

I too see it as just more money spent. So far I have gotten six gifts for my two kids (three each) and only spent $40, but I still have the biggie from Santa. BTW, Santa has so many kids to buy for this year, he can only afford one for each child.

I have also bought for our 2 year old nephew and our 5 month old neice. Our older neices and nephews get $20 each for a total of $80. Now all I have to do is buy for our parents (a total of three presents). Don't know how much there. DH may get some little something but he has already gotten a lot.

To me, the holiday has become who can give the biggest and best and I want it to go back to what you can do for others to make their day brighter.

Keep your chin up and p&pt to you.

Good luck,
Kellie

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-19-2003
Sat, 11-27-2004 - 1:21am
I feel exactly the same way. Christmas this year could just go right past me and it wouldn't bother me at all. I have extra people to buy for this year (my son's girlfriend and her son, a new niece, and a few others), and I haven't bought a single gift so far. I started a second job almost a month ago, but so far I am just playing catch-up. I am not getting in on the at-work gift exchanges because I just can't afford it. December is going to be rough.... car insurance due, property taxes due (just my car, but still), my dd's birthday, and then Christmas. I have no plan, no idea how it will get done. I've been trying to get into the spirit, listening to Christmas music, watching Miracle on 34th Street (I love that movie), but it just isn't happening without the cash. My daughter and I will probably put up the tree Sunday, but I am so not into this. It's very depressing.
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-22-1999
Sat, 11-27-2004 - 9:48am

I'm just a bit bored with Christmas right now. I need change....and I'd just like to be able to skip a holiday every once in a while.

This year money is tight, and I need energy to be focused on my job a few other things going on. I just feel like I don't have the time for it this year.

I am going to try to keep it easy for myself this year.

I know how hard it is to miss a parent during the holidays, but life keeps happening which is a good thing, and they would want to see us happy. We'll just keep hanging in there.

When I left work Wednesday, the tree was already up in the lobby, and I felt like it was just holiday time too soon...................well, too soon for me.

We will find that moment of the holiday that is just for us.

Littlesbigs

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2003
Sat, 11-27-2004 - 11:44am
Just hanging in there. I'm thinking this year, I'm going to cut down on shopping, and spend more time decorating cookies, drinking hot chocolate while watching the snow fall, etc. I have to admit, things are much to rushed at our place for me to even feel like I am enjoying life. I think the favorite thing I ever did at Christmas time was go caroling. It would be awesome if I could find a group around here to do that with. Hoping to get out of the Bah humbug! mood, Heather
Avatar for cl_beckymk
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Sat, 11-27-2004 - 3:36pm

I'm not in the mood either but I think part of that is the weather here, it's just so dreary out and it always compounds the money troubles to me.


Just general over all UGH...I'm hoping once it gets closer and more holiday things start happening, it will be better (we haven't decorated yet or anything)....but on the other hand then everything will be such a whirlwind for us, that it will be here quickly & done with quickly.


Luckily, I have very few people to buy for other than my kids.


iVillage Member
Registered: 05-12-2003
Sun, 11-28-2004 - 8:03pm

Hi Heather,

I've so been where you are. For several years after my mom died, the holidays became a period of the year just to get through. It does get better with time though. My one piece of advice would be that if you're not really feeling into the season, don't force it. The first year after my mom died, my dad, sister, and I tried to recreate the family holidays by doing all of the things we used to do with her, and it was a huge disaster. The family dynamic changes when one piece of the puzzle is gone, and it takes a while for everything to settle out.

On a more general note, if you haven't already read it, I would highly recommend the book Motherless Daughters by Hope Edelman. Its focus is mainly on girls and women who lost their moms in their early 20s or younger, but I found it extremely helpful in getting through the first couple of years after my mom died when I was 25 (9 years ago). I still go back and re-read sections sometimes when I'm missing her and feeling sad.

I'm so sorry for your loss, and my heart really goes out to you. Remember to take care of yourself.

Wendy

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-01-2004
Mon, 11-29-2004 - 7:37am
Well, I love Christmas...the smell, decorating, family and friends...but I hate the spending. I am sad today due to the thought on spending money that we shouldn't be spending!!! I truly believe that I should only have to worry about my children..ny husband thinks other wise...we need to do his mom and his broghter and SIL BLAH! I hope it gets better for all and the holiday is full of spirit.
"Live Life with Pssion"