BIG mistake Please HELP!

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-28-2004
BIG mistake Please HELP!
7
Sat, 04-23-2005 - 7:03pm

Last week my dd had just had minor surgery. I had not slept well in three days, so after her surgery, I was trying to take a nap. The phone rang and my dd answered it, bringing the phone to me. It was a call from MBNA. I owe them 13,000. They were presurring me into giving them money. This card had gotten way out of hand when I was waiting for my car accident settlemnt and I had earlier made the mistake of telling them that I was waiting for the settlement to pay them off.

I was quite groggy and remember three different people being on the phone. I told them that my dd had just had surgery. The last guy got me to agree that I would pay xxx amount of money by the end of April, with another xxx due at the end of May and a final settlement of 5000 due in June. Well, I don't have the money for them to take it out of my account this month or next month. Who the heck knows if I will have my settlement money by then. I was supposed to have it by April!

I know, I am STUPID!!!!

I authorized them to take the money from my checking account!!!! How can I put a stopp payment on it when they are not going to use a check number????? I will not have enough money to pay for my mortgage, as I have to pay for my children's childcare this month on the 25 and my mortgage automatically comes out of my account on the 1st.

Avatar for cl_phocid
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Sun, 04-24-2005 - 12:13am

Close your checking account and open a different one *AT A DIFFERENT BANK* - and learn the very, very important lesson to never, ever, ever give electronic authorization to anyone to access your bank accounts.

All my best,
Danni

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-28-2004
Sun, 04-24-2005 - 9:03am

Good morning Danni.

Thank you...Closing my account never even occured to me. The only problem that I have with that plan is that I have 2 checking accounts with that bank as well as a cd ( this is my summer money, I am a teacher and don't get paid during the summer...with 2 children, taking on a summer job and putting them in camp is cost prohibitive!) and 2 tiny savings accounts.

I am going to go there today and talk to them about what I can do. If it takes closing all of my accounts, then so be it. I cannot afford to let them make my mortgage check bounce, esecially since it would be yet another fee!!!!

I appreciate your thoughtfulness in answering my question. Have a great day.

Jennifer

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-25-2005
Mon, 04-25-2005 - 4:18pm
I am not a financial expert so I don't think I can answer your question. I just wanted to make one point. You are NOT STUPID!!!! You were under stress and made a mistake while under stress. BIG difference.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-28-2004
Mon, 04-25-2005 - 6:33pm

Thnak you. You are right. I am not stupid. Those people knew exactly what they were doing and I was too farazzled to think clearly. I had already made another huge mistake...loaning money to a guy...and was probaly feeling guilty that I couldn't pay on that debt becuse I had loaned this guy money and who knows when/if I will see it again.

I am seeing with much more clarity.

I have been hoarding money and not paying the bills that I could, which led me to have the money availble to loan to manipulative guy "friend".

I am not doing this anymore. I would rather not have bills that go unpaid and "extra" money in the bank.

I have also begun to clean the clutter out of my house and have bought a book by Jerrold Mundis, "HOW TO GET OUT OF DEBT, STAY OUT OF DEBT, AND LIVE PROSPEROUSLY".

It has been very eye-opening.

I appreciate your support, as I am NOT stupid...

Thank you,

Jennifer

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-24-2004
Mon, 04-25-2005 - 9:33pm
You definately want to pay those bills before you start thinking about a nest egg. According to the book by Jerrold Mundis, a credit card debt with a high interest rate, will cost you more in the end, that it negates the nest egg. Also, because you had the extra cash, you felt obligated to lend that guy the money. Had the money had a specific destination, you would have told this guy "sorry, but I just don't have the cash to lend you".

Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting

Avatar for mymartes
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 04-26-2005 - 4:00pm

Hang in there, girl.

You are not stupid. We all make mistakes. The important thing is that we learn from our mistakes and try to avoid making them again.

MYM

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-28-2004
Tue, 04-26-2005 - 5:11pm

I am feeling significantly better about the whole thing. I made a mistake, but my life is not over.

I've picked myself up, dusted myself off, and am ready to start all over again.

Thank you,

Jennifer