Debt and marriage--how it's affecting yo

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-14-2004
Debt and marriage--how it's affecting yo
1
Tue, 09-06-2005 - 4:59pm

Hi,

I was never in debt in my whole life until I got married. My husband has always been terrible with money because he never made much and when he has it, he spent it on dumb things and never did the rainy day fund.

He started up his own business 3 years ago where all profits went to him. As soon as he was making some decent money, he was offered a partnership where he has to split 50% of his profits. So now the income is cut by 50%, plus now he pays employees, and runs a store. AND on top of it, he deals with clients that are SUPPOSED to pay at the end of the month but it's not always so. He has to chase them down for the money.

So that means, putting things on credit cards (his only; we don't have joint anything), holding off on paying bills (I'm seeing late notices everywhere). Yesterday I opened one of his credit card statements and his APR is 30%!!! His other three cars? He's at 28%! How the #@! is he going to pay off the near $10k?

He paid these off multiple times but racked them up right away because of the business or necessity (gas) because these clients don't pay on time.

It's putting a huge strain on us (but especially me since I have debt anxiety). Any time I bring up my concerns, he blows up because he's all about "I TOLD YOU THAT THIS IS THE SLOW SEASON." or I hear "I TOLD YOU I HAVEN'T GOTTEN PAID YET.'

I'm in my early 30s and we have no retirement. No savings. I can barely save my bank account because I'm covering his side of bills (utilities). I'm really concerned for my future and we have to put off having kids because of his finances. Well, I'm in my early 30s now, when is he going to get his act together?

I was wondering is it wrong for someone to want to leave? I know it's all in 'sickness, richer, poorer" but when is it ok to stay and when is it ok to leave for your own future? I know this sounds horrible but I'm miserable thinking what will become of my future. He just says stick it out and see, things will get better. I know he's an excellent salesman but when it comes to figuring out seperating operating and personal costs/income, he's just messing things up and he won't let me help and he won't get help. The $10k we had in savings he used for the business.

Avatar for cl_phocid
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 09-07-2005 - 9:26am

Hello and welcome to the board.

All my best,
Danni