when it rains....
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when it rains....
| Tue, 09-27-2005 - 9:39am |
I guess not being able to pay my bills is not enough. Now it appears that I will lose my boyfriend who I love very much. With two young boys, a full time-plus job, and the desperate need to get a part time job, I can't even give myself the time I need to cry and pick myself up again.
How do you do all the things you MUST do, and not appear you are having a nervous breakdown?
How do you do all the things you MUST do, and not appear you are having a nervous breakdown?

I'm so sorry to hear that. You seem to be under a lot of stress. That happened to me in May. Doctor wrote me sick for 2 weeks because of burn-out. See if you can find some out-time for you... some minutes that belong just to you... like when you take a bath burn some candles and play soothing music. Drink sparkling flavored water (if I remember correct, walmart has that real cheap) out of a champagne glass... you know things like that. The boys aren't up all the time, so when they are in bed, relax. The tears will come about your boyfriend. Make sure you cry them and then find little things to chear you up, like a lighting a potpourri or a candle. Trust me, even minutes help. I sit down, after hubby goes to bed at 9 and crochet with classical music and a good cup of tea. 10pm is usually my bible-reding and prayer-time. Kids are grown, but I was a single mom too with a fulltime job. Now I have a disabled husband at home... speaking of home... time to go home... :).
Hugs
sushi
HUGS!!
Becky
CL of 4th, 5th & 6th grade Scoliosis
I am so sorry you are going through all of this.
First, I admire you. You are obviously working very hard to take care of your boys. That is very special and I know they love you very, very much.
As someone whose life has basically fallen completely apart over the last year, I know how hard it is to even get up in the morning, much less shower, go to work, etc.
Recently my BF of almost two years ended our relationship. My heart is still broken.
And I have to pay all the household bills alone now (we were living together). No kids, but lots of animals and a big, empty house.
I need a P/T job, too, but honestly don't have time. I work 12 hour swing shifts, and between working and sleeping for work, I hardly have time to do basic, everyday things (like laundry) much less get another job.
My advice to you?
Take it ONE HOUR at a time. I have to. I will be "OK" for awhile, then something (like an invitation to my 10 year HS reuinion, LOL) will hit me and upset me and it's all downhill from there.
So I have to keep reminding myself of all the GOOD things in my life, what I have to live for, and keep working hard towards my goals. It is so, so hard.
Having a good friend (my sister in law) to talk to helps.
And I also go to the local mental health clinic once a week for free counseling. And I am thinking of starting meds again, too, but am kinda on the fence about that....
Definitely do what others have said....take some time, even if it is two minutes, for yourself. Do something you like. For me, it is lying in bed, listening to my favorite CD, and snuggling with my dogs. :) They always love me, even if I haven't brushed my hair or my Visa bill is a few days late or my pants don't fit me at the moment.
And remember, that YOU ARE NOT ALONE. Many people in this world love you, and your boys need you. And if some stupid man doesn't care enough about you to treat you right and be with you, then why waste your PRECIOUS time??!?! You deserve the best.
Love,
KN