Never enough money...

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-10-2003
Never enough money...
10
Wed, 02-22-2006 - 4:02pm

Does anyone feel that way??

I get so overwhelmed with paying bills, trying to save emergency money and trying to pay down debt, sometimes I feel like I am missing out on the good things everyone else is doing. My girlfriend who is married and has children like me just went to Orlando this weekend on the spur of the moment for a concert.. just stayed over night like a mini vacation. (we live in Jacksonville, fl.. so orlando is only 2 hours..) I just don't know where people get the money to have fun all the time! She makes just as much money as I do..That little weekend probably cost her over $300.. and it just irriates me that I don't have fun money to spend. I am constantly thinking of different ways to save money, cut expenses.. just so I can pay bills, pay my debt down, and maybe save for a new couch, because ours is disgusting!!

Does anyone else obsess about money, paying bills, paying down debt, saving for an emergency?? I am constantly thinking about it!!!!

Is there a fund I should start called "Shannon's fun money fund???"

Does anyone out there have funds that they start for vacations, or new couches and things like that??

I don't even want to get into the fact that my husband and I want another child.. but daycare for an infant is to the tune of $170/week.. where the heck is that going to come from..?????

Thanks for letting me vent!!!

Avatar for endomagazine
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-09-2004
Wed, 02-22-2006 - 4:22pm

Hello Shannon,

If you haven't heard of Dave Ramsey's Total Money Makeover, you may want to check it out from the library. I too have been overwhelmed with just paying bills, but started to work on Dave's babystep suggestions and the money is starting to go where I send it, instead of flowing through my fingers like sand.

To answer your question about fun money, Dave suggests that you include a small amount (called "blow money") in your budget just for fun. This could be $2 a week for a few vending machine snacks or $10 occasionally for a good book. If you squeeze that budget so hard that there isn't any fun in your life, then the resentment starts... and the urge to splurge a little just to have some fun grows stronger.

Personally, I have put my "blow" money into the emergency fund or added it to my debt snowball when I didn't spend it as expected, but it's always part of the budget.

Yes, I have a vacation fund and xmas money fund. Both are set up with Ing Direct and pull money from my bank account automatically on payday. It doesn't really matter if the amount isn't very high, but having a little extra saved up just in case you want to get something nice (like a new couch) is definitely doable.

I would suggest putting *all* of your money-saving energy into building an emergency fund up to $1000. Then, you can leave that money alone (keeping it for true emergencies, like car breakdown, or roof repairs) and start putting money toward your monthly snowball. Try keeping a little bit for yourself and your family, just enough so you don't feel quite so overwhelmed with "no fun".

I would suggest that you track all of your expenses so you can see where your money goes. It's not so overwhelming when you have some control over where the money goes.

I hope this board is helpful and gives you the support you need!

Sincerely,
Lindsey Schocke

Sincerely,
Lindsey Schocke

Geeks on Tap: Mission Accomplished

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Wed, 02-22-2006 - 4:47pm

I struggle with this from time to time as well. I love Dave Ramsey's point, though, when he says, "Live like no one else today so you can live like no one else tomorrow." Your girlfriend probably put her little trip on a credit card. She'll pay for it later. Meanwhile, you're paying for everything today--so tomorrow you can REALLY have fun. Or maybe your girlfriend has always been good with money, and pays for everything in cash (though that's rare nowadays), and if so--well, good for her! And, lucky her--it's not many people who are raised with/blessed with the skills to do that right from the beginning. You're having to learn from scratch, and there's honor in that too.

It *does* get better, and yes, by all means, set aside money for fun stuff. We have all kinds of funds. We have a "date night fund" so dh and I can have an evening away from the kids twice a month, we have a Christmas fund and a vacation fund and a new floors fund. We each get an "allowance" each month for blowing on whatever (I spend mine mostly on the garden, and set some aside for a "rainy day"--dh blows his the instant it hits his account--his choice--and since it's budgeted for, I don't stress about it), and so on.

Of course, when we started on our debt journey at the beginning, we had nothing like this. It was all we could do to get our bills paid. But, gradually, our income increased and our outgo decreased as we got things under control, and now we can budget some fun.

When our debt is paid off, we'll have about $750 a month to "blow" on "whatever." We'll probably save most of it. But we'll also do more spur-of-the-moment trips, and build a deck on the house, and so on.

Live like nobody else today. You'll live like nobody else tomorrow.

Blessings,

Heather

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-09-1999
Wed, 02-22-2006 - 6:10pm

I too agree with the Dave Ramsey plan. We are doing it & are 16 mths from being debt free! We have adjusted his baby steps a little, our EF is $2000 instead of $1000 & we do have some cushion in our checkbooks on top of that. We have zero cc debt & are working on vehicle loans & parent plus student loan...we will consider ourselves debt free when all we have left is the mortgage...then we'll get busy paying it off.

We have already had our family, we are much older than you. But you are never too young or too old to stop the debt cycle. I know it will be worth it!

We enjoy bowling once a week, we eat out (cheap mexican usually) a few times a month & go to a movie once in a while. If we do a mini vacation it is for CASH or we don't go! We were lucky & enjoyed a week all expense paid vacation in OCT through my work as a reward for working here for 20 years, so we won't need a vacation again for a while. But you know we decided that after working for this many years we should NOT have debt...so we are getting after it.

It is hard not to want to do what others are doing/buying etc...but sometimes the sacrifice is worth it in the long run.

Good Luck & know that you are not alone!
cindylee

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-22-1999
Wed, 02-22-2006 - 7:23pm

Hi, Shannon!

I feel like there will never enough money, too!

Yes, you SHOULD start the "Shannon's fun money fund!!!" I have my funds/aacounts set up for some things, an sometimes it's hard to save, but I keep trying! There is a trip I want to go on, and I can't go if I don't save.....It will be some time before I can go. It does help me to weigh what I want to spend on and where I am wiling to make SACRIFICES......it's a constant battle here with money, but I know I will win, but I have to keep working at it.

I think lots of people on this board stress out about money to one degree or another....you are not alone, believe me!!!!

Don't worry about how other people live and what they have.....everyone has a different life and you may be the object of envy of others because you have a good relationship or talents or something they don't have.....................some people would be willing to trade all they have for health......take stock of what you already have, and make a point to enjoy it.......(That is something I am working on)

Best wishes, Littlesbigs

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-16-1999
Wed, 02-22-2006 - 7:35pm
I know it can be hard to hang on when friends seem to be having more fun. As everyone has said, It really is worth it. One thing I did way back when was to register to do a few online surveys. I do a few and make a few bucks a month. I've been able to stash the money for things I wanted to do. Some of my surveys have led to focus group gigs that pay $100 for a couple of hours. If you could do something like that you could boost your fund a little faster.
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-21-2004
Wed, 02-22-2006 - 7:53pm
Where do you find sites to do surveys that actually pay? I have participated in a few but most never pay anything - it is sort of like you are registered to "possibly" win something. I could sure use some extra money - even if it just a little to answer some surveys.
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-25-2003
Thu, 02-23-2006 - 3:13am

I feel this way, too. A lot.

My best friend often goes on little trips, just for fun. And I make more then her. But she doesn't have any debt and saves up for it in advance. It's a bit easier for me because she tells me months ahead of time - "I'm saving up to go to ________, so I couldn't buy this new shirt/expensive dinner/get new highlights". Your friend probably sacrifices too, she just doesn't mention it.

I can't wait to get out of debt. I'm so sick of not having any money to spend, and watching my friends buy stuff that I can't afford. I'm tired of watching where every cent is coming from and where it is all going. I'm tired of $5 actually being a significant amount of money. And while I am very lucky that DH and I are not picky eaters and can live off of peanut butter and jam or tuna sandwiches, I want to buy ribs! steaks! prawns! yellow peppers! ketchup in the cute containers!

Start a fun money account! Even if you only put a couple of dollars in there, you'll have something to look forward to doing. I have a "baby" fund. It's from the coins from DH's pockets. I've been doing it for 2 months now, and I have $32.05 in there.

Sorry this is so long and self-absorbed. I think the basic idea is that I feel the same way too.

Avatar for cl_beckymk
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Thu, 02-23-2006 - 8:33am

I'm right there with you.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-10-2003
Thu, 02-23-2006 - 9:05am

Well at least I know that there are people out there that feel just like me!! I love the way motormouse put it. I hate the fact that $5 is a siginficant amount of money. Well put!!

I AM going to start my own fund, and not worry about how much I can contribute each month.. Even if it's just a few dollars.. I will be happy!

Thanks you guys.. LOVE this board!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-09-2005
Thu, 02-23-2006 - 9:16am

You know, I was going to come and post about this same topic! Or almost the same.
I just lost my part time job, loss of income. SO I am trying to squeeze all the bills in.
I was wondering if I am trying too hard. Two of our bills are paying themselves off nicely just by virtue of the minimum payments. But I try to put every penny we have on the others and then we don't have enough money for gas and groceries. SO I am stressing too much over it. But I want to see it go down faster!

So I am going to start a few jar funds, that I will put money into each week for Christmas and Vacations and clothing.

I have an ING account that we use for insurance, property taxes, and car tags.

We don't have any other emergency account to speak of.

We are getting enough in tax refunds to pay off 3 small credit cards.

I need to cut up 3 credit cards.

Thanks for all your ideas ladies!
Stacy