Saturday morning

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-22-1999
Saturday morning
1
Sat, 02-25-2006 - 3:40am

I can't sleep....I woke up and was stressing, so thought I'd write here to express myself...then I'll go back to bed. I'm just sick of the stress from work and this whole debt thing. I took a "snapshot" of my debt total last night, and I just do not see it diminishing. I know I have to keep at it, keep at it, jeep at it. And I got bad news at work yesterday about the work I'm going to be doing....the least desireable assignment. I'm stressing out over it.

I'm sick of having Cousin Bernadette as a roommate. She's just too comfortable here. I feel like she'll never leave. (Cousin Bernadette is my name for my relationship with debt....I bad-mouth her....but it's okay!) She's a bit disappointed that I'm not spending on fun stuff like I used to...but the necessities are adding up, and she just wants to be comfortable....Nothing's changed...she's still sitting in my livingroom in that big, ugly bathrobe with the dollar signs all over it, stinky cream all over her face, making noise, laughing at me when I am struggling with trying to change behaviors as I am working on now. She's still always challenging me: "Don't you want to go out? Just for an hour? Want a cup of coffee OUT?" Then she tries to get in the way of my "housepurging" project: "Aren't you tired? You don't have time for this tonight! Lie down and take a nap! Your job is draining you...just rest." Dear Cousin likes the chaos around here and tries to preserve it....I think she knows that if I get my act together she'll be living on "BORROWED TIME!" Oh, she's just bugging me, in my way.....She saw my debt total and said, "I am here to stay! Just maintain me. It will be fine for a while.".....Uummmm, no..............

Thanks for letting me just vent.........................I have good moments and bad moments....I guess stress in general is getting to me............

Littlesbigs

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-09-2005
Sat, 02-25-2006 - 11:50am
Just a thought -- your job sounds like it is draining you -- what you need is a clear space to put it all out of your thoughts. Find one room that you can totally clear -- not the furniture, just the rubble. It seems to help me. At least I feel like I have accomplished something somewhere. Even if it is just cleaning the bathroom!!
Megan