I just don't get it

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-14-2004
I just don't get it
4
Tue, 04-18-2006 - 1:43pm

I check my balances on my online checking daily, my credit cards 2ce a week, haven't put anything on a card unless I need to (go me!) and I still can't save much.

Just got a new job and making more than I ever have. I thought I could save $1k a month! For me, that's amazing. But it's not working out and I just feel overwhelmed like how much do I have to make in order to save and get ahead?

I'm married and while my husband gives me $200-300 towards bills, it's like it doesn't matter.

Here is a rundown of what I pay each month

700 for mortgage share
323 car
100 credit card (min payment required)
100 credit card (min payment required)
77 cable (and no movie channels and no he won't get rid of it)
100 electric
60 gas
40 phone (only bill I'm happy about)
200 HELOC (worse thing I've ever done; balance is $30k! $200 min for 5 yrs)
88 car insurance
90 for train pass for work
20 for train parking
250 groceries
40 water (fluctuates on the season. can be as high as 100 in summer)
$50 in pet food (2 cats 2 dogs and yea yea, I know. But they are my "kids")

his bills are:

mortgage
car
business insurance
cell phone
security system bill
lawn care
car insurance
3 credit cards

This is just ridiculous. I tried figuring out how to cut and save by turning off lights, not buying a lot of red meat, coupons, but that extra $400 I'm shelling out on credit loans is driving me insane. The one card is only 3.99 BT for life so that one I'm doing minimum and TRYING to get ahead with the other one but I just can't. The $500 I put away a check goes right back to bills with MAYBE $100 left over. Retirement savings is a joke. Regular savings is a bigger joke.

I just don't know what to do. Now we just got hit with $1k raise in taxes so again, the $500 I put away goes right back to a bill. I was so hoping to save $12k a year but jeese.

My husband suggests we give each other $1k towards our credit cards (meaning I save a $1k and he gives me a $1k so we can put the $2k towards a credit card). But it's like how can I do that when I can barely save the $500 a check?

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-11-2001
Tue, 04-18-2006 - 5:07pm

Just wanted to give you a cyber hug and let you know I know how it feels. I struggle with these issues everyday. Every time you think you have extra money things go up in cost. I haven't even been offered a pay rise this year, and doubt I will get one. If I want more money, I just need to sell more of our services.

I am in the same boat. I can't save for an emergency fund, as it seems that each time I turn around I have an emergency that needs that money. This month it was another new tire.

I was just talking to my BF the other day that I don't remember people struggling as much in the 70's. I don't think my grandfather could have raised his 4 children and sent a couple to college on his telephone serviceman's salary in this day and age.

That's the thing. Someone like my grandfather, who was a blue collar worker climbing up telephone poles, could buy a house, have my grandmother be a SAHM, have 4 kids, 2 go to college, pay for weddings and still put money in savings. I don't think he made more than $15,000 a year. Equivalent person/job today would not be able to provide his family the lifestyle my grandfather provided his.

That's what I don't understand. How we have made it so expensive to live.

Sorry I have no suggestions, and I can only keep my fingers crossed that things will get better.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-31-2006
Tue, 04-18-2006 - 6:07pm
First of all, I, too, can relate to your situation. One suggestion that I have is to downgrade in the car area, it looks like you guys have two car payments and both pay car insurance. If his car/insurance payments are similar to yours, you are paying $822 per month not including gas. We downgraded with our cars by having a one reliable vehicle with a payment and an older car that we purchased w/ cash. Later, we were able to save up enough to sell the beater and buy a newer vehicle w/ cash. This way, there is no need to pay full coverage as you and not the bank own the car. Just my 2 cents.
Sincerely, student.
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-09-2005
Wed, 04-19-2006 - 2:43am
I was just wondering if you had read any of the Dave Ramsey books or gone through his Financial Peace University -- if not, you might want to get ahold of his book: Total Money Makeover. Now, you other folks who have read his books, feel free to jump in. The reason I'm asking is, if I read him correctly, he seems to think a husband and wife should not have separate accounts. Pool the money -- and give each person a personal amount to spend each month. Dave Ramsey's idea is that when you are married, the whole thing has to work together. I'm just wondering if you couldn't get a better handle on this is you figured out on paper the total monthly amount both of you get and then figure out how much to pay on each bill and how much you could send to your target bill or savings each month. Just an idea.
Megan
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-14-2004
Wed, 04-19-2006 - 12:36pm

Good point about the car. The only thing is that this time I plan on paying this car off and keeping it for 2-3+ years. I've always been stupid with my cars ever since my first one was a beater and I wound up paying $5k and putting $3k more into it and it never got fixed right. Ever since then I was like no way on beaters and bought fairly new. Then I quickly turned the cars over to lease (stupid yet came in handy when I lost my job. Contract was up + no job = easy way to get rid of car without owing). Now I bought a Nissan and I bought it based on the good reputation so it's a "keep until it's dead" car. I'm lucky with the train now so I barely drive it (first 2 years put 40k on it because I drove so far to work).

But the husband has a truck because of work and towing so he needs to keep his.

But I was thinking that while I do have a lot of high bills, perhaps I need to stagger the payments better instead of paying it off right away.

I noticed my paychecks fall within reason of a due date so maybe if I split the mortgage in 1/2 with my paychecks and put it away for when it's due leaves me an extra $350 to cover day to day living (I'm always going to $0 or negative). Plus if I have left over (I need to tame my "wow, I have money, let's spend) I can put the extra towards those stupid cards! My goal is to hurry and pay off the one $5k 7.9% and then start putting money towards the HELOC at 7.9% and let the 3.9 card for life ride until I get the HELOC down.

I just cannot stand this panic panic panic feeling everytime a bill comes, an invitation out with friends, or my paycheck comes. I could kill my husband for teaching me bad ways and getting me that HELOC. Never wanted it but I was stupid to believe his arguments (pay off cards and we'll split the bill; never happened).

Man. I wish the credit industry was more controlled. But that will never happen.