OK I need to know if I am the only one..

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-30-2006
OK I need to know if I am the only one..
5
Wed, 06-07-2006 - 6:50pm

Couple of things here....

Am I the only one who refuses to open some mail??Like credit cards because I now I dont have the money? (our 2 credit cards total less than $700)

Am I the only one who won't answer the phone becasue I'm scared of how much they want?

Am I the only one who won't look up her checking account online because Im scared its overdrawn?

I just talked to my mortgage company...1 payment tonight and then they agreed to half the remaining on the 24th (760.00) and then the other half(737.00) on the 17th of july. What they don't know is that my check didnt go thru so I owe another payment in there, I told the guy and he said its been credited so not to worry about it....

Am I the only one who works out these deals with the creditors? Is it delaying the inevitable??

Gosh, I am LOVING this board!

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-22-1999
Wed, 06-07-2006 - 11:05pm

Hi, Krewcat,

I am sure you are not alone.....

Keep reading thru all the old posts you can here, and you will read about a lot of folks who are dealing with similar things.

Keep breathing.... one step at a time..... you'll make it thru.

Littlesbigs

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-06-2006
Wed, 06-07-2006 - 11:43pm

Am I the only one who refuses to open some mail??Like credit cards because I now I dont have the money? (our 2 credit cards total less than $700)

Am I the only one who won't answer the phone becasue I'm scared of how much they want?

Am I the only one who won't look up her checking account online because Im scared its overdrawn?

I hope you will open your mail and look at your checking account. That is the only way to reverse the financial problems...look at them and tackle them a little bit at a time. I work and don't watch Oprah because it is only on when I'm working and I don't tape it. But she did a financial series that someone had posted about on this board and I went to her website and one of the things that shocked me was some people have years worth of bills they never opened. I always open my credit card statements even if we blew it the month before and charged something we didn't have the money for. Yeah, I feel bad in the months the balance went up instead of down, but you need to know if there is a mistake, you only have a limited amount of time to dispute charges that are wrong. Same with the bank accounts, I once went to a gas station on a weekend and the pump said it didn't go through so I went inside and paid with the same card. Well come Monday I was in the banks offices disputing the double charge. They reversed it right away. Also since we have one bank card that SO and I share, I keep an eye on my account because he will go buy something at the gas station and forget he bought soda and chips to the tune of $6 here, cigs $10 there and after a week it adds up to a $100. We were overdrawn last month because I had backed off a bit, trusted he'd told me what he'd been spending. You can't afford $27-$35 in overdraft or late charges on CC and make progress on your debt. When we started on our debt journey a couple of years ago (we still have another 18 months to go and we might be out of debt, I don't even know where we were at the highest debt). My lowest point was sobbing on the phone to my mom who had offered to help before and I had turned down the help. We couldn't make the minimums on our credit card debt, my car payments, mortgage payments on land we'd purchased and had bounced a couple of checks in a short period of time. Mom ended up getting a home equity line of credit. She paid everything off with that money and we're paying $600 a month for more than 4 years to pay it back. We ended up running up new cards after she bailed us out, but with 4 hurricanes in 2 years we had to get gas cans and propane and screws to secure shutters and food ahead of payday and other necessities on the credit card. Also, a lot of our HD and Lowe's card balances are for tools so SO could work after the storm and he made a lot of money doing tree removal and roof repair, unfortunately it didn't pay all the bills but helped keep the utilities on and food on the table. We got serious in January of this year when I found this board. I paid the minimum around the due date and that same amount two weeks later on my next paycheck. I kept paying the same minimum from January even though it has gone down on all 5 cards because it is my way of "Snowflaking" extra to my debts. Last month things were tight and we're getting late on utilites again so I was going to stop the snowflake, but forgot to cancel it so I'll see where I'm at before the 15th and decide if I can make another payment to CC or if I have to wait. We know SO's income can be unpredictable so I only worry about making one payment a month to each card and hope I can snowflake extra because it is encouraging to see that statement balance drop. This month I opened one bill and it was under $4K I had been opening it each month but didn't realize balance was closer to $4K than $5K till it dropped below $4K this month. What a pleasant suprise to see $39xx.xx . Our overall debt is still $28K but it is much easier now that the car is paid and the minimums are manageable on our cards and that I can even make extra payments some months.

Proud sister of a Marine:

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iVillage Member
Registered: 12-12-2004
Thu, 06-08-2006 - 12:24am
Hi, KC--No, you arent the only one who is scared to open stuff. Awhile back, I did this also. Hid bills under the couch. In the drawer. Or, more creatively, blamed the cats for shredding them (yeah, right on). As long as you sent them something, it shows good faith. DH would ALWAYS find out. Awhile back, it was a nightmare---8 or 9 cards, overdrafts galore, $500/month IRS, etc. It took awhile but I sent in something, anything to those creditors and dealt with one person. Period. l)Sit down and figure out what your totals are, and income. Cut back to the max. Even if you saved $20 for the week, snowflake it to something small and get a victory. 2) Dont let those people intimidate you. Hang in there. WHiz.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-06-2005
Thu, 06-08-2006 - 11:45am

My husband is 8 years older than I am, and we have only been together about 3 years now.

 

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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-09-2004
Fri, 06-09-2006 - 10:48am

Hello,


I know how it feels to dread opening those bills when you don't have the money to pay them. I've found that after facing my finances (flylady prompted me to do it) that when I'm in control of where the money goes, regardless of how many bills come in, I feel less stressed. Now that we have paid down some debt and my DH has a new better paying job, I am feeling much more in control. In fact, I was singing in the elevator this morning and a friend asked me why I was in such a great mood.


I told him that I had

Sincerely,
Lindsey Schocke

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