Got a second job!!!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-02-2008
Got a second job!!!!
12
Fri, 07-11-2008 - 10:45am

I went yesterday to apply for a night-time inventory job. I work now part time MWF and due to not paying for daycare for our two small kids I can't add more hours right now to my day job. So, I found something that works for me and starts at 9 p.m. My DH is home w/the kids and I can leave for work knowing I've seen and tucked in my little ones.


The job is normally from 9 p.m. until 1 or 2 a.m. It pays $8.50 an hour with a $1 raise after 30 days. I am SO excited about this. I go tomorrow morning at 8 a.m. for training.


Here's the "problem" my DH is being pissy about this. For some background on me - I was hiding debt from my DH. He knew about $12K on our credit cards and now we have about $28K. My DH isn't 100% innocent in the additional debt but I am more at fault for that then he is. He did charge a few things but I charged the bulk and hid the debt from him.


I would have thought he'd be EXCITED that I'm taking steps to make changes and earn add'l money. When I got home from the interview last night he just gruffly asked me how many days and hours this would be. I've stressed to him it's at night when the kids and himself are sleeping and he just said it'd be "grueling." I told him yes, but on ME and I am willing to do this. It might only be 2 or 3 days a week. I will be fine. I will still get home and be able to sleep a few hours before the kids get up.


Can you guys give me some excitement please? I am stoked about this job but bummed he doesn't seem excited for me.

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Avatar for cl_phocid
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Fri, 07-11-2008 - 11:36am

I think it's fantastic!

All my best,
Danni

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-02-2008
Fri, 07-11-2008 - 12:04pm

Thank you Danni!!! I am with you 100% as far as the second job money going ALL towards the c/c. I want to deposit that money and once it hits my checking account make an immediate payment towards the c/c for that exact amount. That way the money is GONE as soon as it comes in. I have taken the occasional seasonal job too and am looking forward to having this extra income for my debt.


My mom thought my dh's issue might have been "pride." I don't know about that b/c he provides just fine for our family - its my debt spending that is in need of paying down. Like you said - I asked why he was being rude about it and he didn't speak up so I am going to go on my merry way to this job with a good sense of attitdue. I am doing something to HELP my family!!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-11-2006
Fri, 07-11-2008 - 2:14pm

Hooray for you!! Wow, you really moved quickly to find a second job. You are off to a great start to repay that debt. Sounds like you have a good plan. Maybe your DH will come around in time. Good luck!!

Anne

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-18-2004
Fri, 07-11-2008 - 4:41pm

You have a great attitude.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-06-2003
Fri, 07-11-2008 - 5:19pm

I for one am very excited for you! I work a PT job on top of my full-time one and yes it is not easy but seeing my debt go down faster is a sweet reward. As Danni said, make sure you don't come to rely on the add. income for more than debt reduction.

As for DH, ask him what would he suggest to resolve the issue if it's not you working a 2nd job?

Keep us posted.

Kassandra


"It is said that life has its peaks and valleys.

Kassandra

"It is said that life has its peaks and valleys.  The challenge is to accept them equally and experience them

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-12-2007
Fri, 07-11-2008 - 6:38pm

Congratulations!

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-17-2007
Sat, 07-12-2008 - 12:45am

Good job getting a job Now you need a Ticker.


Hugs


Mary Ann


iVillage Member
Registered: 07-02-2008
Mon, 07-14-2008 - 11:08am

Thanks for all the kind words! I went for training Saturday and I go for my first job at a retail store tonight. A crystal store in the mall! Shiny things!!


What's a ticker and how do I get one?

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-25-2006
Mon, 07-14-2008 - 2:01pm

I think that you should be very proud of yourself for finding a good, workable solution.

Avatar for mahopac
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-24-1997
Mon, 07-14-2008 - 2:34pm

Congratulations on finding part time work that will work for you! That's great. I did the same thing about 20 years ago when I found out that my company hadn't been keeping out local income tax from my paycheck for 3 years, and I owed the local government almost $2000.

I do want to share, though, what your husband *might* be feeling. I can't speak for him, of course, but I know how *I* would feel if I were in his shoes. Please don't take this as criticism, because it's not meant to be. But if I knew that my DH would no longer be home at night and I would be alone every night from 8:30 on, I'd be gruff, too, especially if I thought he could have prevented it by not getting into debt to begin with. If the schedule is grueling on you, the rest of the family *will* feel it. You're going to have to cram more housework, homework, etc. into the time between dinner and leaving for work, which will make everyone feel more stressed. If you're tired, you won't have as much patience for the kids.

Those hours you will work have to come from somewhere, because there are only so many hours in a day. Whether it's sleep or quiet downtime with your DH, you will be losing *something*, and therefore so will the family. This might be what your husband is concerned about.

I'm not trying to be discouraging. It's just that after 25 years of working, in different situations and with DH sometimes working, sometimes not, I've seen most of the ways this can play out. When my SAH DH had to work weekends six years ago, it took a terrible toll on our emotional intimacy (it's hard to be close with someone who's not there because he's working). During the summers, when DH works, it is exhausting for all of us because he is not there to do all the things he normally does during the day. Even when I worked weekends at a retail store to earn money to pay back the $2000 I owed in taxes, I was beat from working 7 days a week and I quit in a couple of months (and I didn't even have kids then!). You can only do that sort of thing for so long before it takes a toll.

Again, I think it's great that you got a job, but I just wanted to see your husband's side in this, too. Maybe it helps you, maybe not.

Kelly

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