A Fresh Start

Avatar for travinski
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-21-2004
A Fresh Start
21
Sun, 10-26-2008 - 2:54pm

Hi everyone. Most here probably don't know me but I was on this board a lot a year or so ago. I was on the verge of suicide. I had got myself in so much debt, sometimes I had no money to get to work. My family thought I was gambling online and that was why I was broke. I nearly went out of my mind!!! I couldn't sleep, I couldn't eat........finally, I had to take a leave from work because I didn't have the mental or physical energy to even go to work. I was about $55,000 in debt and had a mortgage on my house. I am divorced and so had only my income to rely on. I maxed out - like in a drunken stupor, I charged myself into a position where I couldn't charge anymore and that's when my world turned hellish - not being able to pay bills, creditors calling me at work, etc. I thought there would be no end.


Some encouraged me to claim bankruptcy and I wish I had done it when they first suggested it. Instead I waited until the last possible moment and finally gave up the fight. I declared bankruptcy and lost my house. My life was a NIGHTMARE!


I got an apartment and joined Debtors Anonymous. Since then, life has become easier. I read the book, "How to Get out of Debt and Live Prosperously" by Jerrald Mundis and attend weekly meetings. I also participate in telephone meetings. This group has REALLY turned me around.


What we have (or most of us have) is a disease of compulsivity. We aren't bad, terrible or stupid - unfortunately, we were born with this kind of addiction of sorts. I have found much peace and promise in Debtors Anonymous and have forgiven myself for the mistakes I made. I take things one day at a time and don't borrow money anymore. Geesh...I had lines of credit, credit cards, payday loans...the works! I am so glad to be free of all this. If you think you might be a compulsive spender, go to debtorsanonymous.org - I think they have some questions for you to ask yourself to see if you are

Travi

 

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Avatar for mymartes
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: travinski
Sun, 10-26-2008 - 3:14pm

I remember you.

So glad you posted and are getting the help you needed.

MYM

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-12-2007
In reply to: travinski
Sun, 10-26-2008 - 3:45pm

I remember you, too, and am glad you are doing okay.


Take care,


Robyn


iVillage Member
Registered: 04-10-2003
In reply to: travinski
Sun, 10-26-2008 - 3:51pm

(((Travi)))


I remember you! I often would come to this board wondering how you were doing. I'm so glad you checked in to let us know how amazing you are doing! I'm so glad!


Bex -


"Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, today is a gift -thats why its called the present."



Bex -

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-17-2003
In reply to: travinski
Sun, 10-26-2008 - 4:44pm

Oh Travi, you have been through so much.

Avatar for travinski
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-21-2004
In reply to: travinski
Sun, 10-26-2008 - 9:38pm
Hey, thanks you guys! I can hardly believe how horrible my life got when in debt. The day I signed over my house, I cried all the way to my new apartment where I wanted to take my own life. I am still on an extended leave of absence but it feels so good to have that huge pressure off of my mind. I was practically in the fetal position when I was on this board before. Sometimes I still can't go back and read what I typed or it would still depress me. I am so glad I found this group! I don't feel like "the only one" anymore. In fact, more and more I realize that there are many of "us" out there - they just choose not to talk. When I first joined, all I did was cry for the first two meetings. I didn't just feel like I hit bottom....I felt like I hit it and was dragged across it for a long time. Things are so much better now. I'm surprised people remember me! I'll definitely stick around and read what's going on with you guys. On a sad note, I lost my father to

Travi

 

Avatar for earnhardt_jr_fan
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
In reply to: travinski
Sun, 10-26-2008 - 9:59pm

Trav,


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Avatar for mymartes
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: travinski
Mon, 10-27-2008 - 7:05am

So sorry to hear about your dad.

MYM

Avatar for travinski
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-21-2004
In reply to: travinski
Mon, 10-27-2008 - 12:17pm
Thanks so much. I don't know if any of us thought I would make it. Am I upset I'll likely never have another house again? You bet - but nearly as upset as when I didn't know when my next meal came from. You all were so supportive. At the time, I don't think I could be comforted because all I could forsee was disaster. I have my dignity back now. That's worth far more than a house. I've learned so much from Debtors Anonymous and plan on sticking with the program for a very long time. Thanks to all of you who didn't tire of my worrying, fretting and abject terror. I hope I can do some good by giving some back so plan on sticking around for a while. You all are the best.

Travi


Travi

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-10-2003
In reply to: travinski
Mon, 10-27-2008 - 1:16pm

I remember you too, and have often wondered how you were doing, and praying you were still around even if you were not on the board!!!


It does sound like you are in a much better place right now and I am SO very GLAD about that!!


Sorry to hear about your father.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-09-1999
In reply to: travinski
Mon, 10-27-2008 - 1:57pm

Hi

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