Facing Reality

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-02-2008
Facing Reality
6
Mon, 11-17-2008 - 6:02pm

The time has come my friends for a reality check. Background: I have two friends getting married. One in April in Boston and one in October of 2009 in Florida. I am in the wedding of the friend in Boston. We have been friends since the 2nd grade.


I guess in some crazy pea sized portion of my brain I truly believed I would be able to attend both weddings. We are about $27,000 in c/c debt and are working slowly (but steadily) towards financial freedom. We expect a good tax return which will all go towards debt.


I have taken a second job and saved up about $800 in an e-fund which will be soon depleated by about $450 for new tires for my DH.


When all is said and done - we can't go on this trip to Florida in April. I am sad about this but two vacations / weddings in one year isn't possible for us. My friend in Boston LIVES in Boston but my friend who is getting married in April lives by me in Chicago but wants a destination wedding. She's already told me if we can't go she will understand but I SO WANT to go.


Anyway, feeling depressed about stuff. I feel like my second job has gotten us nothing but new tires and that bums me out.


Anybody else out there facing reality like this? Something you were hoping against hope you might be able to achieve but its just not gonna happen?


iVillage Member
Registered: 07-05-2006
Mon, 11-17-2008 - 6:56pm

Hey, I know I don't know you...BUT I own a timeshare and I can get pretty cheap weeks in Florida. We're talking $250 dollars for a week in a condo with 2 bedrooms. I've recently been trying to rent them out because I can't afford the damn taxes on the place so we won't be taking anymore vacations in th next few years. Let me know if you would like some information. I would hate to miss such a good friends wedding. Such a hard choice. I couldn't even afford the plane tickets to get to Florida right now!


Abbie

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-25-2006
Mon, 11-17-2008 - 7:01pm

Abbie,
I'm pretty sure I'd be dreaming here but if BeepsMom isn't interested, I might be if you could get something in northern FL the week of 2/21.

Peg

Avatar for mahopac
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-24-1997
Mon, 11-17-2008 - 10:08pm

Yeah, it happens a lot.

IMO, when people plan destination weddings, they're doing it for themselves, not for the convenience of anyone else. They want their dream, fine. I don't need to stretch myself thin to make someone else happy.

DH had three friends who got married in crazy places. The first two he didn't go to and there was NO QUESTION about it. They wanted to get married in the Caribbean and South America, fine. We had a family to support. The last friend got married this year in Spain, and we had a big row over it. In the end, he went. It wasn't that we couldn't afford the money, it was that the money was absurdly out of line with what I think anyone should expect someone else to attend their wedding, and absurdly out of line with what one half of a couple should spend on themselves. But he went, and I believe he was happy with it, and in the end, it wasn't worth my saying no. However, he would never have dreamed of going if we'd still had debt. Period.

Life is full of saying NO to other people's choices. If you want personal integrity, you have to say no sometimes. You can't let other people dictate your life.

Kelly

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-22-1999
Mon, 11-17-2008 - 11:09pm

I agree with Kelly.....You can't let other people's decisions make decisions for you.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-17-2007
Mon, 11-17-2008 - 11:35pm

If you are really interested in renting out your timeshare send me some information kimbler@bellsouth.net


I know someone who might be interest. I would email you privately about this because it really should not be put on the board but you got that you don't want to receive private emails So you are going to have to write me


Mary Ann


iVillage Member
Registered: 11-18-2008
Tue, 11-18-2008 - 3:36pm
I,m a 67 year old retiree and live on a very fixed income. I don,t own my own home and rent in public housing, so needless to say, I don,t have alot of money. My sister lives in California and I haven,t seen her in over three years, but with airline tickets so high now and all the new charges with your luggage and all I don,t know if or when I will ever get to see her again. I so want to visit with her before we pass on, but I