Drowning in credit card debt :(

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Registered: 03-27-2003
Drowning in credit card debt :(
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Thu, 11-20-2008 - 12:00pm

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Edited 11/22/2008 12:27 am ET by greta2863

 

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Thu, 11-20-2008 - 10:06pm

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Edited 11/22/2008 12:29 am ET by greta2863

 

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Thu, 11-20-2008 - 10:21pm
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Thu, 11-20-2008 - 10:29pm

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Edited 11/22/2008 12:31 am ET by greta2863

 

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Thu, 11-20-2008 - 10:35pm


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Edited 11/22/2008 12:31 am ET by greta2863

 

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Registered: 11-17-2007
Fri, 11-21-2008 - 1:01am

Sorry you thought I was harsh to you. But I was just going by what you said in your posting.

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Fri, 11-21-2008 - 7:36am

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Edited 11/22/2008 12:32 am ET by greta2863

 

Avatar for mahopac
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Registered: 07-24-1997
Fri, 11-21-2008 - 9:50am

People post on multiple boards trying to find different perspectives on the same problem. I'm not being aggressive here, I'm trying to be helpful. Avoidance - of work, unpleasant situations, and problems - is a common behavior in depressed people. I know this from growing up with a sister who didn't discover Zoloft until her 40s and from being married for 20+ years to a wonderful man who struggles with depression, mostly successfully but sometimes not. Both would be the first to tell you that not showing up for work, even when it costs you, can be a sign of depression. It may not be in your case, but don't shoot me for suggesting it.

Sometimes debt happens because people have had dreadful bad luck, a bad medical situation, or extended unemployment. Sometimes, though, debt is a symptom of a larger problem - depression, a sense of entitlement, irresponsibility, or a refusal to face the things that are really wrong in our lives. For my DH and me, it was a combination of both things beyond our control - a sudden reduction in income - and things we could have done something about much sooner, like the "magic thinking" that somehow things would be all right. We got out of debt when I realized we had to tackle it head-on and make BIG changes in our lives and our attitudes. That took time, effort, and a lot of sacrifice over four years.

If you come to a board and ask for help, you have to expect that not everyone's response will be what you wanted to hear, but at least give people credit for trying to help you.

Kelly

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Registered: 07-02-2008
Fri, 11-21-2008 - 11:09am

The motivation to want to change and WORK five days a week has to come from within. Do you feel you are lacking something in life that makes you unmotivated to work and wanting to go out and charge when you know you can't afford something? (don't have to answer this - just a question to ask yourself.)


Trust me, I have debt too. I was lacking something and I am working to find out a solution to that problem in my life. I did charge things I needed - gas and groceries for my family - but also things I DIDN'T need which caused us to be further in debt than we needed to be. But the past is done and so is yours. The time to change is today. FIND the motivation to go to work every day. Make it a treat. Make that 60 cent hot cocoa every week a Friday treat for GOING each week. Start wtih small steps. You have a huge blessing here - living for $100 / month which leaves you the rest of your paycheck - minus gas and cell phone (and the other things you listed) to put allllllllllllllllllllllllllllll towards debt. NOW is the time.


Best of luck!!

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Registered: 03-26-2003
Fri, 11-21-2008 - 2:02pm

Hey Greta,

What do your parents say when you don't go to work? When you don't pay them the $100 a month you're supposed to pay? I have two daughters and I know that I wouldn't tolerate if for a second if they were blowing off their responsibilities. My youngest has a college education and works at a gas station because that's the only job available to her right now. She's put her resume out all over the place, but in Michigan it's difficult to find a different job, so she keeps the one she has. It's not fun and her schedule is awful (nights and weekends), but it pays the bills. kwim?

I understand your job is boring and you hate it. Life is icky sometimes and we have to do things we don't want to do. I don't really love getting up every morning at 5 a.m. and working until 5:30 every evening, but I'm grateful for the job I have. I'm also going to let you in on a little secret, the greatest feeling in the world is paying off debt. Just picture in your mind how much money you'll have in your pocket every month when you don't have those payments! On top of that, you'll be proud of yourself for taking the bull by the horns and getting it done.

You know what you need to do and no one but you can make you do it. It's only 8 hours out of 24 in a day so put on a happy face and head off to work! :-)

Sue

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Registered: 08-02-1998
Fri, 11-21-2008 - 3:52pm
Maxed out is a TV program where the host helps people get themselves out of debt. I'm not sure what station carries where you live but it is on Slice and W here in BC. It is a good show that shows people where they can end up if they don't get there debts in order. Another show that I like to watch is called "Til Debt do us Part", it is hosted by Gail Vaz Oxlade. www.gailvazoxlade.com It is also on Slice and a couple of other stations here carry it. I find her information very helpful. Hope this helps you.
Sharon