So I decided I'm obsessed . . .

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-10-2003
So I decided I'm obsessed . . .
4
Tue, 03-10-2009 - 7:19am

and I need to get a hobby, lol. (warning: this is a vent!!)


Bex -

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-22-2008
Tue, 03-10-2009 - 8:31am
I think you are very wise to try to balance this out.
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-04-2008
Tue, 03-10-2009 - 9:22am

Honey,


I am soooo with you in the obsessed club it is not funny!




iVillage Member
Registered: 11-14-2008
Tue, 03-10-2009 - 11:57am

No, no you are right. You are obsessive. LOL! Everyone here is obsessive. Its good and it is bad.

Someone told me a long time ago a little bit of advice. It is hard to do sometimes but I am working on it.

BE where you are WHEN you are there.

If you are at work, work your hardest. If you are with your boy friend, enjoy his company. When you are exercising do it to the fullest. When you are thinking about debt give it your all.

Like I said, hard, but it is supposed to add enjoyment and fulfillment to your life.

Good luck.



iVillage Member
Registered: 07-14-2008
Tue, 03-10-2009 - 7:07pm

Oh! I so get this! My DH is very much more relaxed and money in general than I am. Honestly a small amount of credit card debt, two car payments and not paying the mortgage early would not bother him. It took me a long time to convince him that we need more cash in the bank, just in case. He spends more money on himself than I do, and he buys more for the kids. I have made a decision that to keep my marriage happy, which is also best for me and the kids, I need to be okay that he is more relaxed than me. So, I am the "saver" and he is the "spender". He has been very supportive in my quest to decrease debt load and start to save for things first. He also increased his monthly contribution to our emergency fund. He also acknowledges that our life will be easier in the future due to paying down the mortgage early and saving lots in RRSPs. I admit that he is okay to spend money as long as we are saving too.

I have had to make myself stop thinking about the money as much as I was. I am working on finding a healthy balance, but it is hard at times.

Go easy on yourself. You are only trying to do what is best for both of you. You will find a good balance for you and your DH. It took us a long time. We never "fought" about money, but often became frustrated with eacho other. We have a plan now, and it's working for us. Too bad it took 13 years!! You will find a plan that will work for you too.